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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29149587">some nights</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Set_Suna/pseuds/Set_Suna'>Set_Suna</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>What We Do Between the Shelves - Dream SMP Grocery AU Fics [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cathartic Yelling, Child Abuse, Denial, Dream SMP Grocery AU, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Dynamics, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Injuries, No Beta We Die Like Wilbur in Skyblockle, Panic Attacks, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Sleep Deprivation, everyone's mad at themselves for something they can't control haha!, guilt tripping, thats a rough tag to add lmao, we continue to dunk on motherinnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:07:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>21,443</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29149587</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Set_Suna/pseuds/Set_Suna</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>While he tried to do the mental math, he was distracted enough to not pay attention to where he was going. Tommy tripped, falling over another pallet truck and into the pallets stacked on top of it. He blinked himself back into focus, barely noticing the way his knee and elbow ached. He… was stuck. He’d gotten entangled with the mass of empty pallets and metal parts and quickly found out he was unable to move. His ankle was caught under the truck he was pulling and his body was weighed down by the pallets that had tumbled off of it and onto him. His vision was still swimming, and he felt a familiar sense of panic set in. He <em>knew</em> someone heard that. Now they were going to come over here and see him like this and then they would <em>know</em> something was wrong-</p><p>“Tommy? You alright?” Wilbur’s voice called.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Grayson | Purpled &amp; Ranboo &amp; Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, Ranboo &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo &amp; Wilbur Soot, Ranboo &amp; Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade, Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit, TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Wilbur Soot &amp; Technoblade &amp; TommyInnit &amp; Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot &amp; TommyInnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>What We Do Between the Shelves - Dream SMP Grocery AU Fics [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2184690</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>103</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>914</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Dream SMP Grocery Store AU, SBI Family Feels</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/getouttamyswamp/gifts">getouttamyswamp</a>.</li>


        <li>
            Inspired by

            <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28393056">DreamSMP Grocery Store AU headcannons</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/getouttamyswamp/pseuds/getouttamyswamp">getouttamyswamp</a>.
        </li>

    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>MMMMM I said I was gonna write this for so long then I had no idea how to end it so now its gonna be multi-chaptered. But yeah its the piston incident but grocery au and then some more in the future I have no idea when I'll update this again anyway ily all mwah</p><p>for Kali <em>blows kiss</em></p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tommy yawned, covering his mouth with one hand to muffle some of the noise. He’d slept like shit the past few days, and he was doing his best to hide the fact. For one, he couldn’t afford to slack off in school or work, or his parents would be on his ass in an instant. Secondly, he’d had this talk with Wilbur, Phil, and Techno too many times for him to keep doing this. He’d stay up late doing homework or getting distracted by something on his phone and then it’d be 3 A.M. and he would be wrecked. The vicious cycle had snowballed throughout the whole week, and at the moment, Tommy was standing only thanks to the Monster he’d downed before his shift. He could hide behind caffeine and work in the back and make sure the others didn’t worry. </p><p>He never meant for his sleep schedule to get so shit. It always just sort of… happened. He always had to force himself to fix it when someone else noticed how miserable he was. Not this time, though. He’d manage this one by himself. He wouldn’t need Wilbur spamming him with messages to go to bed at 11 each night until he was back on track. He didn’t need others to bother worrying about him. He could take care of himself. If he couldn’t by now, that’d just be embarrassing. </p><p>Tommy trudged through storage, pulling along a pallet truck stacked high with its namesake. He walked past Wilbur, Techno, and Tubbo, who were all deep in a conversation he didn’t have the energy to listen in on. He was crashing, he could tell. If he could just finish this quick, he could sneak into the break room and pop another energy drink to power through to the end of his shift. It was routine, at this point. Trying to picture the number of energy drink cans teens had thrown away in this store was like trying to picture Dream without his sunglasses and mask. </p><p>While he tried to do the mental math, he was distracted enough to not pay attention to where he was going. Tommy tripped, falling over another pallet truck and into the pallets stacked on top of it. He blinked himself back into focus, barely noticing the way his knee and elbow ached. He… was stuck. He’d gotten entangled with the mass of empty pallets and metal parts and quickly found out he was unable to move. His ankle was caught under the truck he was pulling and his body was weighed down by the pallets that had tumbled off of it and onto him. His vision was still swimming, and he felt a familiar sense of panic set in. He <em>knew</em> someone heard that. Now they were going to come over here and see him like this and then they would <em>know</em> something was wrong-</p><p>“Tommy? You alright?” Wilbur’s voice called.</p><p>Tommy swallowed his unease and responded, “Um, not really. I think I’m stuck.”</p><p>“Stuck? What did you do to get stuck pulling a pallet truck?” Tubbo’s voice asked, closer than Wilbur’s was. They were moving. </p><p>“I tripped, sue me,” Tommy grumbled, finally getting his eyes to work as Tubbo and Wilbur appeared around a corner. </p><p>The first thing Tubbo did was let out a cackle. He could tell Wilbur was holding back his own laughter, which he appreciated, even if it hurt a bit. </p><p>“Seriously, man, how did you get yourself in this situation?” Wilbur questioned him, light tones of laughter on the edge of his words.</p><p>“I-I wasn’t paying attention and I tripped over this stupid pallet thing, now are you just gonna stand there and laugh or are you gonna help me?” Tommy replied frustratedly.</p><p>Instead of a helpful response, Tubbo doubled over in laughter. Wilbur coughed into his fist and turned his head away, failing to keep down his laughs this time. Tommy groaned, trying to ignore his heart as it started to race. He tugged his arms from where they had been stuck between some pallet slats and attempted to twist around. It didn’t work all too well, and trying to shove the pallets off his torso didn’t go any better. He bit his lip as he felt a gasp coming on. No, he wasn’t about to break down because his friends were laughing at him because he’d gotten himself stuck. If he was in any better mood, he’d probably be laughing too, but today it just <em>stung</em>.</p><p>“Guys, really, I can’t move,” Tommy whined.</p><p>Tubbo and Wilbur were talking--laughing--at something, but Tommy didn’t hear what. Probably him. He watched their lips move but could only hear his own heartbeat in his ears. That’s it. He was gonna die trapped under wooden pallets and a hunk of metal. And his friends would watch and laugh. Well… fuck that. </p><p>Tommy braced himself against the pallets and tried to pull himself free. He yelped, feeling something twinge uncomfortably in his ankle. The shock of pain that shot up his calf made him wince. No way that was good. So, that plan wasn’t gonna work. He looked desperately to Tubbo and Wilbur, only to find they weren’t paying attention. The tears gathering at his eyes were involuntary. So was the whole not-being-able-to-breathe thing. </p><p>“What’s goin’ on back here? I could hear Tubbo laughing from the break room,” Techno suddenly said. Tommy hadn’t noticed his arrival. He hadn’t noticed much of anything, besides the pain in his ankle. </p><p>“Tommy got himself stuck between the pallet trucks and shit,” Wilbur reported lightly, wiping at his eye. </p><p>“How does that even happen?” Tubbo’s high-pitched voice asked no one in particular. </p><p>He couldn’t stand it. He readied his hands beneath him and pushed up. He felt the pallets above him shift for just a second, before he got too far and a burst of pain shocked him into stillness. He muffled another yelp to a whimper and dropped back onto his stomach. Why wasn’t anyone <em>helping?</em> He hid his face in his arms, hating the tears flowing down his cheeks. It felt as if the pallets were crushing him, making it harder to breathe. His breaths stuttered, and he knew there was no going back. The world was miles away, hidden behind wood and metal layers thick that was crushing him to death. He’d suffocate and the world would keep turning. It was obvious no one would care. If they did, he’d be out of here by now. </p><p>“Uh, don’t think I care,” Techno commented. “So, are you guys gonna help him, or do I have to be the one to step in and stop the panic attack?”</p><p>That’s what it was. The blatant addressal of Tommy’s horrible state really was just the killing blow. His face was still in his arms, his fingers digging into his skin. His chest hurt and he could barely hear over the sound of his own sobs and struggling breaths. Breathing was really, really hard. Everything <em>hurt</em>. He wanted the pain to stop. </p><p>“Shit--get-get everything off of him--Tommy. Tommy, can you hear me?” Wilbur’s tone quickly shifted from carefree to serious. </p><p>He felt gentle hands break his grasp on his arms and hold his tightly. Tommy tried to pull back, feeling ashamed and embarrassed and <em>really</em> not wanting to be seen right now. Wilbur wouldn’t let go, though, no matter what he tried. Every breath stung even though the weight on his back was lifting. He clamped his eyes shut because he knew he couldn’t look Wilbur in the eye. He dug his nails into Wilbur’s hands and shook his head.</p><p>“Wil, <em>please,</em> I can’t-” he choked. </p><p>“Hey, it’s alright, you’re okay,” Wilbur told him in that brotherly voice that always made Tommy feel warm. “Can you look at me, Toms? Please?” </p><p>Tommy hummed uncomfortably, but hesitantly looked up. Wilbur was on his knees in front of him, and his soft smile was all he could see. </p><p>“There,” he said quietly, brushing his knuckles across Tommy’s cheek and wiping away the tears trailing down it, “not so bad, huh? I’m right here with you. It’s almost over, I promise.” </p><p>Tommy nodded, holding in another sob. A gasping breath escaped him and he squeezed Wilbur’s hands tighter. He reigned his breathing back in, listening to Wilbur’s whispered comfort. He felt the weight lift from his ankle and he scrambled away. He didn’t care anymore, he latched onto Wilbur’s comforting presence and slammed into his chest. The man’s arms wrapped around him and held him tight. Tommy buried his head in his neck, doing what he could to hide his tears. </p><p>Wilbur sighed heavily. He muttered guiltily, “I’m sorry, Tommy. I was being a dick, I should’ve just helped you. I-I didn’t mean for this to happen.” </p><p>“It’s okay,” Tommy whispered hoarsely. </p><p>He meant it. He didn’t care about what they did anymore. He was just so <em>scared</em> and he wanted that feeling to <em>leave</em>. He felt weak and vulnerable and so much like a child that it made him sick. So he held onto Wilbur, sniffling and hiccuping until his body didn’t have the energy to keep it up anymore. He heard the sounds of people moving around them and took one last shuddering breath. He slinked away from Wilbur, pathetically rubbing tears from his eyes. Tubbo tensed to his left. He reached out and took Tommy’s hands in his, eyes glassy as he stared.</p><p>“You’re hurt,” his voice cracked, examining the small cuts and scrapes Tommy’s arms had acquired. Turns out, shoving them through the slats of pallets did that when done recklessly. He pulled his hands to his chest and mumbled a thick, “I’m sorry, Tommy. I didn’t even realize-”</p><p>“It’s alright, Tubbo, really,” Tommy insisted, not sure if he could keep it together if Tubbo started crying, too. “It’s not your fault.” </p><p>“Anything else hurtin’? You were pretty stuck under there,” Techno asked to his right. </p><p>Tommy blanked before he remembered the throbbing ache in his ankle. He realized he was practically sitting on it and quickly shoved it out from underneath him. Techno blinked and gently took his ankle in his hands. He pressed his fingers into his skin slowly, stopping as soon as he saw Tommy wince.</p><p>“Well, it’s a bit swollen, but there’s no bruising or anything, so that’s good,” Techno reported, carefully removing his hands. “Looks like just a sprain, not a bad one, either. Rest and ice for a few days will solve your problem easily.” </p><p>Tommy didn’t breathe for a second, but a second was long enough for the others to notice. He stammered, “I-I can’t take time off. If I miss school or work my-my parents-” </p><p>“It’s okay, Toms. We’ll figure it out together,” Wilbur cut him off before he could spiral, setting a grounding hand on his knee. </p><p>He swallowed hard and nodded. His grip tightened on Tubbo’s hands. How was he gonna explain this to his parents? They’d already been coming down hard lately thanks to midterms. If he wouldn’t be able to work, life wouldn’t be any better at home. It would be so, so much worse. </p><p>“Tubbo, can you go find one of the managers? Wil and I’ll take Tommy to the break room and we can talk this out there,” Techno said, making eye contact with Tubbo over Tommy’s head.</p><p>“Y-Yeah,” Tubbo answered quietly, nodding and slowly letting go of Tommy’s hands to stand.</p><p>As he hurried off, Tommy moved to rise to his feet and didn’t get the chance. Wilbur slipped his hands under his knees and around his back and lifted him easily. He yelped in surprise, wrapping his arms around the man’s neck to ease his pounding heart. </p><p>“I could walk,” he grumbled.</p><p>“I’d prefer if you didn’t,” Wilbur said. “We don’t want your ankle getting any worse.”</p><p>“You’ll probably be fine to walk on it later, but I can’t stop Wil from worrying,” Techno commented. “I’ma go find some ice. I’ll meet you in the break room.” </p><p>Tommy was quiet as Wilbur carried him to the break room. For once, he had no idea what to say. He felt embarrassed, to say the least. He kept his eyes locked on the floor as it passed beneath him. He’d been hiding his lack of sleep from everyone until now. He didn’t think he’d be able to keep the act up for much longer. Really, it wasn’t so supposed to get this bad. It wasn’t supposed to lead to <em>this--</em>being carried to the break room because he’d hurt his ankle from being so sleep deprived. He didn’t want another serious talk about taking care of himself. He tried, he really did, sometimes it… it was just hard. </p><p>Wilbur helped him sit down before propping his ankle up on another chair, his own coat shoved under it for some cushioning. He dragged a chair to sit beside him. He’d pulled the first aid kit from the cupboards and opened it on his lap. When he carefully took one of Tommy’s hands in his, he didn’t resist. Some part of him, still afraid of being stuck forever, wanted the touch desperately. He watched Wilbur’s hands instead of his face. He tugged some disinfectant wipes from their package and Tommy braced for the sting. </p><p>He was already expecting it when Wilbur asked, “Is everything alright, Tommy?”</p><p>“If-If I tell you, do you promise not to get mad?” Tommy replied, voice small. </p><p>“Of course,” Wilbur answered softly.</p><p>He forced the words out of his mouth. They were hard-edged and uneven, like they weren’t really his. “I haven’t been sleeping very well, lately. Before you say anything, I know I need to take care of myself. I try, I swear I do, but my parents haven’t left me alone at <em>all</em> because of midterms. They’re making sure I keep my grades up and still work and I can barely find time to do everything without sacrificing something so-”</p><p>“Hey, hey,” Wilbur interrupted him gently, running a hand through his hair to get his attention, “it’s okay. I know how awful your parents are to you, you don’t have to make excuses to me.”</p><p>“I just-I just don’t know what to do, Wil,” Tommy admitted, hating how his voice cracked. “They <em>never</em> fucking ease up and-and it <em>sucks</em>.” </p><p>Wilbur frowned, but didn’t get the chance to respond as Techno entered the break room with ice in hand, closely followed by Tubbo and Dream. Tommy hissed as the intense cold sent a shiver across his body. Wilbur finished covering the exposed scrapes and shut the first aid kit, looking up to lock eyes with Dream. </p><p>“So, I heard about this,” Dream said, staring at Tommy’s ankle before looking back to Wilbur, “but what’s really happening?”</p><p>“Parents are being shit, nothing’s new,” Tommy grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back in his chair.</p><p>“He hasn’t been sleeping enough,” Wilbur stated flatly, subtle anger barely noticeable in his tone. </p><p>“But I can’t stop working, Dream! If I don’t keep up with school and this, my parents are going to be--fucking unmanageable,” Tommy struggled to find a nice way of putting it. </p><p>The tension in the room rose. Despite his efforts, everyone picked up on the dark connotations. In all honesty, Tommy didn’t know how long he had until one of his parents snapped. He always felt like he was avoiding landmines when he maneuvered around his house. He tried to stay away from his parents and any conversation with them as much as he possibly could. If he came home tonight, ankle sprained and not able to work for a few days, he had no idea what they would do if they found out. He felt a hand force its way into his. He’d been digging his nails into his arms again, and he hadn’t even noticed. The skin was red where his fingers had been moments prior. Now they were clasped around Wilbur’s. He was panicking again. </p><p>“It’ll be okay, we’ll work this out,” Wilbur promised and turned back to Dream. “What are our options?”</p><p>“I can’t let Tommy work while he’s hurt, that’s not changing,” Dream said matter-of-factly. When Tommy opened his mouth to object, he was cut off, “You’ll get a few days of PTO. You have so many days saved up, it barely even matters. On the home front… I’ll still let you come in as if it were your regular hours, but no actual work, alright? You can hang out back here or in the bakery or something, just don’t make your ankle worse.” </p><p>With so many eyes on him that weren’t going to argue on the matter, he sighed. “Fine… thank you, Dream.” </p><p>The man’s shoulders slumped slightly, and his voice was softer when he said, “It’s no problem, Tommy.” He gained a bit of his usual life back when he turned to the others and asked, “Can I leave it to you guys from here?” </p><p>Wilbur nodded, and Dream left them alone again. Tommy couldn’t say he wasn’t relieved. If he was suddenly taking time off when he was scheduled to work days before, his parents would get suspicious. They would not be happy, and they would make sure he knew it. He hated staying in his house longer than he had to. And after today… he really didn’t wanna go back. </p><p>He hated the silence that filled the room after the door closed. He looked up from his hands and said, “Can we just get this over with? What do you want to tell me?”</p><p>Wilbur exhaled through his nose. He met eyes with Techno, having a silent conversation before looking back at him. “Do you want to stay with me and Techno for a while?” </p><p>Tommy’s heart stuttered in his chest. Stay? With Wilbur and Techno? It… did sound nice. Terribly nice, actually. Anything to get away from the pressure and nerves he felt in his own house. </p><p>“Unless it’s going to make things worse, then forget I even asked-” Wilbur was saying, tapping Tommy’s hand restlessly. </p><p>“No! No, I mean, uh, yes. Please, I’d, ah, I’d really like that,” he fumbled, nodding stiffly. </p><p>“Are you sure? This won’t… mess things up at home?” Wilbur asked again, staring at Tommy expectantly.</p><p>“They don’t fucking care where I am. As long as they don’t get a call that I’m dead in a ditch, it doesn’t matter,” Tommy snapped. That didn’t sound too good, did it? He glanced up and winced at the looks the others were giving him. Sad, disappointed, pitying. He mumbled, “Sorry…” </p><p>“No, don’t-don’t apologize. If this is what you want and you’re sure it’s okay, we’ll do it,” Wilbur told him softly, squeezing his hands again. </p><p>“Okay,” Tommy swallowed, suddenly very nervous. “Thanks, Wilbur.” </p><p>Wilbur smiled, reaching to ruffle Tommy’s hair. He said, “No problem, Tommy. Do you need to stop at home once we get off?”</p><p>Wilbur cared. Everyone at the store cared about him in a way his parents never would. It made him want to cry and tell them he loved them and forget everything about his home situation. But he was a kid. Life wasn’t that easy. He couldn’t just stand up and leave his home behind. So he found these reprieves to be the best things in the world. </p><p>It was easily sorted: Tommy would stay off his feet for the rest of his shift and go home with Wilbur and Techno. He had zero desire to sit in the break room alone while the rest of his friends went back to work, so with the right amount of pleading and puppy-dog-eyes, Tommy got what he wanted. It’s how he ended up being carried around on Wilbur’s back for the rest of his shift. With the store in a lull of customers, it wasn’t a big issue for them to charge around the store, bothering their friends and freaking out the few customers they passed. Laughing was easy when his friends made it so easy to forget what bothered him. It was especially simple when Wilbur helped him swipe Quackity’s radio, holding it a good height above him thanks to their combined. </p><p>“Alright, I get it, you’re both lanky-armed bastards, give me back my fucking radio!” he complained, grinning as he made another attempt to snatch it from Tommy’s hands. </p><p>“Just grow, Alex, it’s not that hard,” Karl commented from his register through giggles. </p><p>“Yeah, sure, I’ll just shoot up three inches and be as tall as you motherfuckers.”</p><p>“See? Now that wasn’t hard,” Wilbur cooed as Tommy let Quackity retrieve his radio. </p><p>“I hate you all so goddamn much,” Quackity grumbled, joining Karl behind his register and elbowing him roughly in the side to stop his laughter. Everyone decided to ignore the clear smile on his face. </p><p>Much to his chagrin, Tommy was getting extremely tired. He tucked his chin to his chest and pressed his cheek against Wilbur’s back, the gentle rocking as they headed towards the back making his eyes want to close. He heard Wilbur chuckle, and he groaned when the man bounced on his feet and jostled him.</p><p>“Tired?” he asked warmly.</p><p>“Shut it, bitch,” Tommy mumbled, weakly kicking Wilbur’s thigh with his heel. </p><p>“You’re adorable,” he replied, a smile obvious in his voice. </p><p>“I will stab you.”</p><p>“You don’t have the energy.”</p><p>Tommy hummed, proving him right in an instant. Only since it was Wilbur he let himself do this. He always felt an unexplainable safety when he was around. He felt like he could let his guard down and not have to worry about keeping up acts. Being sleepy only made him be more soft. It was embarrassing. He tried to hide his face even more between his body and Wilbur’s.</p><p>He still had to stop at home and get some things. That wasn’t something he was looking forward to. He couldn’t bring Wilbur or Techno inside to help. He’d have to sneak around his parents and out without drawing too much attention to his swollen ankle. Getting upstairs and down again would be a struggle, but he’d have to deal with it. In his mind, it was worth the risk. Spending time with Wil and Techno and not in his own house was enough to sell him. He just had to make it through this last obstacle. He hoped it’d turn out okay.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Stop trying to guilt trip me, it’s not working,” he told her flatly, voice heating up as he continued. “And don’t talk shit about my friends! You don’t know anything about them! All you ever talk to me about are my grades and how I constantly fail to meet your stupid fucking expectations! What the hell do you even know about me?”</p>
<p>His phone vibrated in his pocket. It felt like the noise shattered the precarious balance of power in the house. His mother’s eyes shot to his pocket.</p>
<p>“What is it?” she asked, tone laced with a thinly veiled anger. “Go on. Tell me.”</p>
<p>Tommy pulled his phone from his hoodie pocket, hand shaking from a mix of anger and fear. He felt his breath catch in his throat. It was a text from Wilbur. Simple, easy, something to show he cared. He never got these from his parents. <em>Everything okay?</em></p>
<p>“Just Wilbur,” Tommy told her, clicking his screen off. “He asked if I got home okay. That seem like a bad friend to you?”</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I POWERED through this shit hot damn. I wrote this all in one sitting except for like, the first paragraph. Hopefully it lives up to expectations fhdk</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tommy sat alone in the back of Wilbur’s car, staring out the window. Usually, he’d be talking to fill the silence, even if no one was listening or answering him. It didn’t feel right to do that today. His ankle was propped up on the seats beside him, half melted ice pack barely cold on the swollen skin. His backpack was abandoned on the floor, half zipped and stuffed with all his things from work and school. Wilbur and Techno were in the front seats, muttering to each other about something Tommy didn’t want to bother to try and listen to. They were making a tense drive to his house, where he’d have to sneak inside, pack a duffel bag, and make it out again without alerting his parents to his new injury. Part of his brain thought <em>it’s kinda fucked you have to sneak around your own house, huh?</em> while the other part swatted the thought away, not eager to deal with it now.</p>
<p>He told Wilbur it’d be fine if he stayed at his and Techno’s place, but he really didn’t know if that was true. It was true that his parents usually didn’t care where he went as long as he came back alive and without trouble, but with the amount of pressure they were putting on him recently from midterms, he didn’t know what they’d do if they found out. He didn’t even know if not telling them would be the better or worse option. Either way, he was losing his fucking mind in that house. He would do anything to get out for a few days. </p>
<p>He suddenly realized the car was stopped, and it was his own house he was staring at outside the window. He blinked, sitting up straight as Wilbur turned in his seat to look at him. He looked worried, of course he did, and Tommy hated how guilty it made him feel. </p>
<p>“Are you sure you don’t want any help?” Wilbur asked.</p>
<p>“Yes, I’m sure,” Tommy insisted for about the fifth time, swinging his leg around and slipping his bulging backpack over his shoulder. “I’ll just run upstairs, shove some shit in a bag, and get out.” He huffed at the stern look Wilbur gave him and corrected himself, “Not actually run upstairs, just as fast as I can.”</p>
<p>Wilbur looked unsatisfied, but Techno shoved his face out of the space between the seats to lean around and say, “Just be careful. I don’t want Wil to explode because he got an aneurysm.”</p>
<p>Tommy smiled at the joke, missing the warm smile appearing on Techno’s face as he pushed open the door and stepped out, tentatively putting weight on his ankle. It wasn’t too awful, but he’d prefer if he didn’t have to stand on it for too long. </p>
<p>“Alright, be right back,” he called inside the car before shutting the door and heading towards the front door. </p>
<p>His grip tightened on his backpack straps as he slowly climbed the steps. The pain in his ankle flared, but it was fine. He was fine. He’d be fine. If it went like it normally did when he got home, he would be nervous for no reason. He’d go up to his room, empty his backpack and get what he needed, then be out without any interaction. His hand was shaking as it gripped the doorknob. He took a breath, and entered his house as quietly as possible. </p>
<p>It was completely silent as he shut the door behind him. There was no sound of TV from the living room or movement in the kitchen. He begged his parents were tucked away in their offices, focused on work and unable to hear him as he walked as quickly and quietly as he could towards the stairs. He inwardly groaned when he took the first step, still feeling the dull ache of climbing to the porch. He steeled himself, he could do this, it would be worth it in the end. He braced for impact, steadying himself with one hand on the railing, and trekked up. </p>
<p>Tommy was starting to realize he had a really low pain threshold. He was just really good at acting like nothing was wrong. His feet hit the top landing and he beelined it for his bedroom, slipping inside and hobbling over to his bed and collapsing. He heaved a sigh into his comforter, gripping the fabric tightly. This sucked. He squeezed the comforter a bit tighter. It would be okay. He kept telling himself that, but wasn’t sure how much good it ever really did him. </p>
<p>He took a deep breath in a feeble attempt to calm his racing heart. He pushed himself up, slipped his backpack off, and dumped its contents on the floor. There was one thing Techno asked of him: to be quick. Believe him, he wanted to be. The feeling of walking across broken glass was back, and he didn’t want to give Wilbur an aneurysm. He shoved what he needed for school in his backpack and limped to his closet. He pulled a duffel bag from the shelf across the top and haphazardly began stuffing clothes inside. Once that was done, he hobbled to the bathroom, snatching his toothbrush and mentally preparing himself to hop back down the stairs. </p>
<p>Going down was not as bad as going up. He put less weight on his ankle and was able to swing himself down easier than pulling himself up. It was a straight shot for the door. So of course something had to go wrong. </p>
<p>“Thomas,” his mother’s voice stopped him in his tracks as he walked past the kitchen. He quickly turned to look at her, instantly feeling his hands get clammy. She eyed his duffel bag, raising an eyebrow as she asked, “Going somewhere?”</p>
<p>“Yeah,” Tommy forced his mouth to open and say something, “I was gonna go to Tubbo’s and study then stay over. You don’t care, do you?” </p>
<p>Lying to your parents shouldn’t be so easy.</p>
<p>His mother hummed and returned her eyes to her magazine. “Maybe I should, considering your grades lately. They’ve been dropping, Thomas.”</p>
<p>A burst of anger sparked in him, and he was never good at controlling those. “That’s not even true! I have some of the highest grades of anyone in my year!” </p>
<p>“Your math grade dropped a letter,” she stated coldly. “Don’t argue with me. We told you before, if you want to keep that job so badly, you’d have to be responsible.”</p>
<p>“I <em>am</em> responsible!” Tommy continued to argue. </p>
<p>“Maybe letting you get a job wasn’t the best idea,” his mother sighed, looking back up at him, clearly disappointed. “You’ve been less on top of things lately. I’m not sure the friends you’ve made there are a good influence on you.”</p>
<p>It was then Tommy knew he had no reason to listen to her for any longer. He tightened his grip on his duffel bag and turned to the door, grumbling, “Well, if you have nothing important to say to me, then I’ll be leaving now.”</p>
<p>He heard his mother scoff. She raised her voice to call, “This is what I mean! You never used to talk back to me.” </p>
<p>Maybe he should’ve kept walking. Maybe he should have just ignored her and stormed out the door. He didn’t have to keep this stupid fight going for any longer. That didn’t stop him from spinning on his heel, ignoring the twinge in his ankle, to stare down his mother as she stood in the doorway to the kitchen. </p>
<p>“Stop trying to guilt trip me, it’s not working,” he told her flatly, voice heating up as he continued. “And don’t talk shit about my friends! You don’t know anything about them! All you ever talk to me about are my grades and how I constantly fail to meet your stupid fucking expectations! What the hell do you even know about me?”</p>
<p>His phone vibrated in his pocket. It felt like the noise shattered the precarious balance of power in the house. His mother’s eyes shot to his pocket.</p>
<p>“What is it?” she asked, tone laced with a thinly veiled anger. “Go on. Tell me.”</p>
<p>Tommy pulled his phone from his hoodie pocket, hand shaking from a mix of anger and fear. He felt his breath catch in his throat. It was a text from Wilbur. Simple, easy, something to show he cared. He never got these from his parents. <em>Everything okay?</em></p>
<p>“Just Wilbur,” Tommy told her, clicking his screen off. “He asked if I got home okay. That seem like a bad friend to you?”</p>
<p>“Don’t use that tone with me,” his mother chided, her deathly cool tone sending a shiver down his spine. “What are you trying to say? That your father and I don’t care about you?”</p>
<p>“I’m glad you’re finally catching on,” Tommy commented dryly. </p>
<p>There were worse things that could have happened. He just didn’t expect <em>this</em> to be the breaking point. It happened suddenly, fast enough that Tommy only registered the sting a few seconds after it happened. The sharp sound of skin connecting with skin, palm skidding across cheek, pierced the air. Tommy slowly raised a hand, gingerly touching his stinging skin. He stared at his mother’s raised hand, watching as it fell to her side. </p>
<p>“How <em>dare</em> you be so ungrateful for all your father and I have done for you,” she whispered, voice quaking with restrained anger. She stepped back, raising her hands in a giving up gesture. “Go on, then, if you don’t want our love, leave.”</p>
<p>
  <em>You never gave it to me.</em>
</p>
<p>The words died on his tongue. Tears pushed from his eyes and down his cheeks as he spun around, using all his willpower not to run for the door and down the steps, past Wilbur’s car and the school and the grocery store, past the city limits and out into the countryside, out where no one would find him ever again. He slammed the door behind him, moving fast and feeling the shocks of pain shooting up his ankle as he descended the steps. He bit back a sob, not bothering to wipe the tears from his face. </p>
<p>He threw open the door to Wilbur’s car, throwing in his bags and himself shortly afterward. Both Techno and Wil were turned in their seats, staring back at him with concerned gazes. He felt the heat rushing to his face, finally deciding to wipe the saline from his cheeks as he started to hiccup. </p>
<p>“Tommy, what happened-?” Wilbur tried to ask.</p>
<p>“Just drive!” Tommy talked over him, not wanting to be anywhere near the collection of doors and walls that his parents thought was a home. </p>
<p>He buried his head in his arms and pulled his knees to his chest. He wanted to disappear. The sound of his mother’s hand connecting with his cheek rang in his ears. His skin still burned where the contact had happened. He expected this to happen one day. The ultimate show that his parents didn’t give a single shit about him. He didn’t expect it to hurt so much. They never showed him love, but today, some part of Tommy died. There was still some part of him that had hope, that maybe one day his parents would see things differently and they’d actually care for him. That part of him still had hope that somewhere behind the harsh words and unwieldy expectations, there were two parents who loved and cared about their son. Now, Tommy was sure there was no chance. </p>
<p>His parents had never loved him as they should have loved their son. And they never would. </p>
<p>He flinched, hearing the car door beside him open. He hesitantly looked up, barely able to make out Wilbur’s outline through his bleary eyes. He rubbed at his eyes, forcing the tears away. He hadn’t even noticed they’d left. They were already at Wilbur and Techno’s apartment complex. He met Wilbur’s eyes and felt like he could burst into tears all over again. </p>
<p>“C’mon, Toms,” he urged gently. “I’ll help you get upstairs.”</p>
<p>As soon as his feet hit the sidewalk, Tommy pressed himself against Wilbur’s chest, hiding his face in the man’s coat. He pushed down another wave of sobs and wrapped his arms around Wilbur’s torso. Wilbur’s reaction was instant, enveloping him in a hug that never failed to make him feel safe. He felt Wilbur’s chin rest atop his head, he listened to his heartbeat in his chest, and for a brief moment, he felt comfort. </p>
<p>“Do you want me to carry you?” he asked softly. </p>
<p>Tommy nodded, not sure he could make himself move no matter how hard he tried. He stiffened, feeling Wilbur’s arms move from his back to pick him up. He hid his face in Wilbur’s neck, feeling safe this time rather than embarrassed. The heat from his cheek had started to calm, but he could still feel it. He didn’t think he’d ever forget it. His mother had <em>slapped</em> him. She’d hit him. He tightened his grip around Wilbur’s neck, curling in a little bit tighter.</p>
<p>“I’ve got you, Toms,” Wilbur whispered reassuringly. “You’re alright. I’ve got you.”</p>
<p>He heard Techno fumbling with keys, unlocking the door and leading them inside. Instead of sitting him down, Wilbur sat on the couch with Tommy still in his arms, keeping him in his lap. Tommy slid his arms from around Wilbur’s neck and lifted his head, staring down at his hands rather than looking Wilbur in the eye. He heard Techno rummaging around the kitchen. It was just the three of them. Tommy wondered how long it would be until it was just him.</p>
<p>“Talk to me, Tommy,” Wilbur said. “Tell me what’s wrong.”</p>
<p>Wilbur raised a hand towards his face--and Tommy tried, he really tried not to, but he flinched. Wilbur froze, staring at Tommy with a look he could only describe as horror. Tommy knew Wilbur would never do anything to hurt him. He would rather die than do anything that would hurt him. He was probably going to run a hand through his hair or wipe the tear tracks from his cheeks, touches Tommy was painfully familiar with, but fresh wounds made one defensive of the hurt area, and Tommy wasn’t over his injury yet. </p>
<p>“What did they do to you, Toms?” Wilbur asked sadly.</p>
<p>If there was any time to fall apart, Tommy supposed it was now. His face scrunched up, trying to resist and failing as a sob burst from his chest. He hid his face in his hands, feeling as hot tears slipped past his shoddy defense. Wilbur’s arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him close to his hip and <em>fuck</em> if it wasn’t nice. It felt better than any-fucking-thing to feel cared for. A hand started to comb through his hair as Wilbur murmured gentle assurances in his ear. <em>You’re safe. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. You’re okay.</em> Tommy wasn’t okay. He was probably the furthest thing from it. He was <em>scared</em> and <em>upset</em> and life fucking <em>sucked</em> but he’d be lying if he said Wilbur’s warm words and comforting presence didn’t make him feel even the slightest bit better. </p>
<p>He fiercely wiped at his eyes with his hoodie sleeves, willing himself to stop sobbing uncontrollably. It wasn’t working at all, really. It only served to frustrate him and make him cry harder. Wilbur’s fingers still ran through his hair, and he tried to focus on the motion instead of the pain in his chest. Wilbur whispered to him encouragingly, helping him calm down enough to the point where his chest no longer ached with each breath. Still with his sleeves held to his face, he peered through his fingers. At some point, Techno had sat at the other end of the couch, carefully supporting his ankle in his lap. Wilbur’s expression was filled to the brim with worry, but when he saw Tommy gazing up at him, an easy smile fell onto his lips. </p>
<p>“That’s it,” he encouraged softly. He continued as Tommy slowly dropped his hands from his face, “There you are.”</p>
<p>“I’m gonna wrap this around your ankle, alright Tommy?” Techno told him, showing him an ice pack wrapped in a damp washcloth. </p>
<p>Tommy nodded, wincing as the cold material touched his skin. Wilbur rubbed a hand along his back. Techno comfortingly squeezed his uninjured leg. They sat in a calming silence for a few moments. Wilbur waited for Tommy to calm down a bit more before speaking.</p>
<p>“Can you tell us what happened?” he asked. “Please?”</p>
<p>Tommy swallowed. As much as he just wanted to hide it, to not let them know what he’d just been through, he didn’t think any lie he could make up would satisfy Wilbur about why he had just flinched away from his touch. So, he dug his nails into his jacket sleeves, and took a breath. </p>
<p>“Uh, my-my mum she-she spotted me on the way out,” Tommy mumbled. “We got into a fight and, uh, she-” his voice cracked, “-she hit me.” </p>
<p>He felt Wilbur and Techno tense. It was terrible. Everything was fucked and Tommy had no idea what he was going to do about it. He didn’t know if there was anything he <em>could</em> do. He inhaled stutteringly, digging his fingers deeper into his arms. </p>
<p>“She told me to leave and-and I don’t know if I’m allowed to go back,” Tommy continued shakily. Wilbur pulled him back to his chest, and Tommy hiccupped as he found himself crying once more. “I-I don’t know what to <em>do,</em> Wil, I-I don’t think they want me to come back-” </p>
<p>“Tommy, love, light of my life, it’s going to be okay. I promise we’re going to figure this out, okay?” Wilbur told him, and Tommy could hear it in his voice that he was crying too. “You’re going to stay right here with me and Techno and-and we’re gonna keep you safe, alright? We’re gonna figure it out, and we’ll do it together.”</p>
<p>“We’re not gonna let them hurt you anymore, alright?” Techno added, voice tight, shifting so he was pressed against Wilbur’s side. </p>
<p>Somehow, Tommy found it in himself to nod. Nothing was going to be the same. That was the one thing Tommy was sure of. His whole life was about to change. Everything from this point forward was uncertain, and though he was scared, somehow he could believe it’d be okay. That with Wilbur and Techno, they’d hold up on their promise. That they’d be okay. </p>
<p>“I’m so sorry, Toms,” Wilbur cried into his hair, hugging him tighter. “I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.”</p>
<p>Tommy breathed shakily, forcing himself to <em>stop fucking crying</em> and wriggle his arms around Wilbur’s chest, hugging him hard. “It’s-It’s not your fault, Wil, it’s not. Don’t-Don’t blame yourself for this… p-please.” </p>
<p>He felt another set of arms wrap around him and Wilbur. He was pulled in Techno's direction, and was very suddenly aware of how safe he really was here. Techno rested his chin on top of Wilbur’s head and released a wobbly sigh. </p>
<p>“We can’t control everything, Wil,” Techno mumbled.</p>
<p>With one sharp inhale, Wilbur seemed to compose himself. He slowly sat up, expression serious in a way that reminded Tommy that his pseudo-brother was, in fact, an adult. He lifted his hand and hesitated, looking to Tommy uneasily. He nodded, and leaned into the touch when Wilbur’s hand cupped his cheek, brushing away tears he didn’t get the chance to earlier. </p>
<p>“Alright, Toms, I won’t,” he agreed quietly. He swiped his other arm across his eyes, getting rid of the tear stains before bringing his hand up to hold Tommy’s face in his hands. “You know I love you, right, Toms? Because I love you so much.”</p>
<p>Tommy nodded, tears breaking through as he blinked them away. His voice was hoarse when replied, “I love you too, Wil.”</p>
<p>“I’m here too, y’know,” Techno piped up, sounding very unsure if now was the time for a lighthearted quip. Either way, it made Tommy laugh, which made both men smile. Techno continued, “But seriously, if there’s anything I can do about it, nothing like this is ever happenin’ again.”</p>
<p>“It’s okay,” Tommy insisted quietly, the happiest he’d sounded in the past thirty minutes. “I… I trust you guys.” </p>
<p>And it was true. It still hurt, it hurt so much, but right now, it was okay. Instead of entwined guilt and disappointment he felt love and warmth. Sitting on the couch in Wilbur and Techno’s apartment, held in the former’s arms, felt more like home than anything he’d felt with his parents. Now he was sure that wasn’t where his true family lied. He knew where he was supposed to be, where the people who loved him were. They were right here, making sure he was safe and calm and okay. Wilbur still held him close, rubbing small circles on his back. Techno had returned to tending to his ankle, readjusting the ice before venturing to the kitchen for some painkillers. </p>
<p>There was finally peace in Wilbur and Techno’s apartment, and in that peace, it was too easy for Tommy to give in to sleep. He was exhausted, and frankly, he didn’t give a shit about school. Fuck midterms. He was going to sleep. He deserved it.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is for Kali and Scribble I know you're reading this I love you both mwah </p>
<p>But FOR REAL I. have no idea how much longer this will be??? we'll see where it goes from here. I'll stop when I feel like I've reached a good conclusion, I guess. Much love to y'all &lt;33</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Alright,” he started, softening his tone when he saw Wilbur and Techno wilt, “what did you want to tell me?”</p><p>“I’m-I’m sure you can assume that it’s, um, about Tommy,” Wilbur stumbled around his words nervously. </p><p>Phil nodded patiently. He sighed, “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”</p><p>“When we stopped at his house after our shift,” Wilbur began slowly. He paused, looking as if he was building up the courage to say what he wanted to say. He grimaced, managing to admit, “It-It didn’t go very well. At all.”</p><p>He took a breath, and now Phil was really worried. Wilbur’s hands were shaking slightly where they clutched his glass. Techno was death-gripping a fork, and Phil was mildly concerned he’d bend it. They were clearly bothered in their own ways, and they were ways Phil couldn’t discern what had happened at all.</p><p>“So… how did it go?” Phil prompted.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>uh oh time to figure out what the hell happens next!! I am figuring this out as I go I have no solid plan please be patient with me fhskd</p><p>anyway, no TWs for this chapter, besides a brief CW for mention of what happened last chapter, stay safe, y'all!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Wilbur ran his hands through his hair, elbows leaned on the kitchen counter. He stared down at his phone screen, reading and rereading the text he sent Phil over and over again. </p><p>
  <em>We need to talk</em>
</p><p>Four words shouldn’t instill such fear in him. In this context, they were the most horrifying thing in the world. He had to recount everything that had happened today, and he had no fondness for the idea of reliving it. Tommy’s parents had finally taken it a step too far, and Wilbur wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if he did nothing about it. </p><p>He sighed and hung his head, pushing his fingers under his round-rimmed glasses to rub exhaustion from his eyes. Tommy had fallen asleep quickly, and Wilbur didn’t hesitate to carry him to his room to let him rest. He needed it, as far as Wilbur was concerned. It’d been two hours since then. They’d ordered takeout and left what they ordered for Tommy in the fridge. Wilbur had paced their tiny kitchen for nearly half an hour, debating with Techno on the best course of action. They decided two things: 1. They couldn’t let Tommy’s life be the same as it was, and 2. They were young, inexperienced, and should probably get some outside help. So, Wilbur had composed his four word text to Phil, and was now anxiously waiting for an answer. </p><p>A mug was slid under his nose, steaming up his glasses and making him look up with a frown. Techno leaned his back against the counter beside him, his own steaming mug in his hands. He slipped his glasses from his nose, wiping them clean with the hem of his shirt, acting more annoyed than he was. It wasn’t a well known fact, but Techno Patented Hot Chocolate had healing powers. At least, Wilbur swore it did. It always managed to raise his spirits and calm him down when he was anxious or just amped up with too many thoughts. Right now, he was an aggressive cocktail of both of those things, so he was very grateful for the tradition. Maybe it was just because Techno wasn’t a very expressive person in the first place, but the times they shared warm cocoa felt all the more special. </p><p>“I don’t know what you’re waiting for,” Techno said, glancing down at him with a slightly mocking smile. “Phil’s totally gonna help. He’s way too much of a softie not to.”</p><p>“It’s not Phil that I’m worried about,” Wilbur replied. He scooped up his mug and matched Techno’s posture. He stared down at his gently waving cocoa and said, “It’s Tommy.”</p><p>“When are you not worried about Tommy?”</p><p>“You know what I mean!” he sighed exasperatedly. He tightened his grip on his mug. “He’s already had it so rough, I have no idea how this is going to affect him.”</p><p>Techno huffed, “Yeah. I think he still had hope, y’know? That his parents… cared.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Wilbur mumbled. He gently knocked his forehead against the lip of his mug. “I just want to make it better for him, you know?”</p><p>“I do,” Techno agreed quietly. He liked that about having a twin. You were practically always on the same page, with not much needing to be said between you. </p><p>“I… I feel like there has to be <em>something</em> I could’ve done. Like-Like there was some opportunity I missed,” Wilbur began, lifting his head and twisting to face Techno. “Beyond today--there had to be something <em>more</em> I could’ve done, right? It-It didn’t have to end up like this… right?”</p><p>He looked to his brother for anything, for some sort of closure to this question that neither of them had the answer to. Techno exhaled through his nose, shrugging as if he himself wasn’t satisfied with the reaction. </p><p>“I dunno, Wil. Tommy’s parents have always been toeing a very fine line,” Techno told him, eyes lost in his mug. “I think that it was just a matter of time before they crossed it.”</p><p>Wilbur didn’t want to believe it. He didn’t want to accept that this was the way things had to be. Tommy was just a kid! A kid with larger than life expectations weighing on his shoulders, a kid with parents who didn’t understand that he was crumbling before their very eyes because of those expectations, a kid with parents who would rather whip him into shape rather than deal with the fact that their son’s mental health was basically nonexistent. He couldn’t understand how people could lack such basic empathy. Tommy didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve to have to go searching for love. He was worthy of it exactly the way he was. </p><p>He abandoned his mug on the counter, wrapping his arms around his torso and digging his fingers into his sweater. He stared at his feet, only making the pressure building behind his eyes more obvious. He muttered, “We can do it, can’t we? Hold up on our promise?” </p><p><em>We can make Tommy’s life better?</em> was left unsaid. </p><p>He was slowly pulled forward, head falling against Techno’s shoulder as he was brought into a hug. Tommy told him not to blame himself, but god did it feel fucking impossible. He bit his lip as tears streaked down his cheeks. He unlatched his fingers from his sweater to wrap his arms around his brother. He could’ve gone inside with Tommy, made sure things would’ve gone over smoothly. He could’ve protected him when things turned for the worse. He breathed shakily, letting the tears drip from his nose onto Techno’s shirt. He squeezed him tight, ignoring how hard his hands were shaking. Techno lightly ran his fingers down his back.</p><p>“It’ll be okay,” he mumbled. “We’ll be there from now on. Always.”</p><p>Wilbur nodded against Techno’s shoulder. He exhaled a trembling breath. If he couldn’t do something before, he sure as hell could do something now. He wouldn’t fuck it up this time. He’d protect Tommy. He’d keep his little brother safe. </p><p>Another little known fact: Techno gave amazing hugs. They were so comforting, he almost didn’t want to let go when his phone buzzed against the counter. </p><p>-</p><p>Tommy woke up in a haze. He felt disoriented. He groaned, rubbing his eyes and rolling over. He tugged the sheets up around his shoulders… and was completely confused. When did he get in bed? He’d fallen asleep on Wilbur’s couch, wrapped in the man’s arms. He forced his eyes to stay open and pushed himself into a sitting position. </p><p>He was in Wilbur’s room, sleeping in his bed. The clock on his side table read 7:19 AM. He’d slept for nearly ten hours. Well, all things considered, he wasn’t really surprised. Yesterday was… rough, to say the least. </p><p>Tommy sighed, pushing a tentative hand to his cheek. If he thought about it hard enough, he could feel it again. The sting and the pain. He shook his head and tossed the sheets off his legs. No use thinking about it now. It happened, it passed, and they were gonna figure out what to do now together. Dwelling on it would just make him feel like shit, and he’d had enough of that for a while, thank you very much. </p><p>He swung his legs over the side of the bed and winced as he put pressure on his ankle. Right. Sprained. He’d have to deal with this for a few days until it got better. He inhaled a breath and sucked it up, trudging to the door and out of Wilbur’s room.</p><p>The main room of the apartment was already alive and bustling. Techno was dumping eggs and bacon onto some plates at the breakfast bar while Wilbur shoved two pieces of bread in the toaster. Tommy eyed them a bit incredulously as he limped over and pulled himself on top of a stool. Techno gave him the same look as he dropped the pan in the sink. </p><p>“How much does it hurt?” he asked, crossing his arms across his chest expectantly.</p><p>“Good morning to you, too,” Tommy greeted sarcastically. He shrugged, staring at his ankle as he swung it around his seat. “I dunno, I can walk, so not too much? Maybe, like, a six on a scale of one to ten. Six point five.” </p><p>“Higher than five. Techno?” Wilbur prompted. </p><p>“Still needs rest and ice,” Techno declared. “One night of sleep wasn’t gonna fix it, anyways.”</p><p>“What am I supposed to do then? Not go to school?” Tommy asked, rolling his eyes and biting down on a piece of bacon.</p><p>“No, you’re still going to school,” Techno answered, seating himself on the stool to Tommy’s right. “You just have to be careful with it. No more running around than you have to do.” </p><p>Tommy groaned. “This sucks.” </p><p>“Well, you’re just going to have to deal with it,” Wilbur replied, sitting on the stool to his left. “School is mostly sitting, anyways. Just don’t go messing around between classes and you’ll be fine.” </p><p>“Boring,” Tommy stated. </p><p>“Bitch,” Wilbur countered.</p><p>“Prick.”</p><p>“Child.”</p><p>“Eat your food before it gets cold or I swear to god I will get the baguette,” Techno interrupted their petty-word battle. </p><p>Tommy cackled as Wilbur instantly shoved an entire strip of bacon in his mouth. It was so warm. Not temperature-wise, more metaphorically. Most mornings, Tommy would just grab a granola bar and book it. He hadn’t sat at the table and had a good breakfast with family in so long. Thinking too hard about it would just make it feel sad, and that’s the last thing Tommy wanted. He wanted to enjoy this morning with his practically-brothers and actually believe he was going to have a good day, because for once he could believe it before it happened. </p><p>Getting ready wasn’t that much of a struggle. Hobbling around on one good foot was more entertaining thanks to the worried glances Wilbur kept shooting him. Techno roughly ruffled his hair in the bathroom while they brushed their teeth, chiding him for making his twin worry on purpose. Tommy argued it wasn’t his fault if Wilbur decided to dedicate half his energy to worrying about him. </p><p>As they stood at the door to the apartment, Techno dropped two pills in his hand and shoved a glass of water into the other. Tommy downed them easily and handed the glass back, receiving his second hair tousle of the morning. He swatted at Techno’s hand halfheartedly and followed Wilbur out the door, flashing him a middle finger instead of a goodbye as he closed it behind him. </p><p>Pulling up to school was a lot more melancholy than Tommy expected. That brief period of comfort had been nice, but couldn’t last forever. Real world issues had to come back at some point. And he knew they were going to have to talk about last night eventually. He just… didn’t want to have to do it soon. </p><p>Wilbur put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. “I’ll be by to pick you up at the end of the day, and any of the others if they need a ride. Text me if you need anything, alright?”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah, I will,” Tommy sighed. He slung his backpack over his shoulders and pushed himself out of the car. “See you later, Wil.” </p><p>“See you later,” Wilbur repeated. </p><p>And Tommy watched as he pulled away, turning and trudging towards his demise. What the <em>fuck</em> was he gonna tell Tubbo? </p><p>-</p><p>Phil tapped his foot restlessly against the floor. When Wilbur had messaged him last night with an ominous <em>We need to talk</em> and asked if they could meet for lunch before their shifts, he instantly knew something was wrong. He couldn’t tell how bad it was, but it definitely wasn’t good. This had the feeling of a about-to-be-broken-bad-news lunch, not casual-get-together-cause-we’re-friends lunch. He knew they stopped by Tommy’s house last night to get his things. He could hope it wasn’t about that, but he knew it’d be best to not be optimistic. </p><p>They’d made it through their meal, carefully stepping around the obvious conversation waiting to happen. Wilbur awkwardly talked about simple things, like how they’d made breakfast this morning and who they’d be working with later. Techno was quiet, chiming in periodically, but never having too much to say. When their plates were gone and Phil couldn’t stand the putting off of the issue any longer, he leaned forward on the table. </p><p>“Alright,” he started, softening his tone when he saw Wilbur and Techno wilt, “what did you want to tell me?”</p><p>“I’m-I’m sure you can assume that it’s, um, about Tommy,” Wilbur stumbled around his words nervously. </p><p>Phil nodded patiently. He sighed, “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”</p><p>“When we stopped at his house after our shift,” Wilbur began slowly. He paused, looking as if he was building up the courage to say what he wanted to say. He grimaced, managing to admit, “It-It didn’t go very well. At all.”</p><p>He took a breath, and now Phil was really worried. Wilbur’s hands were shaking slightly where they clutched his glass. Techno was death-gripping a fork, and Phil was mildly concerned he’d bend it. They were clearly bothered in their own ways, and they were ways Phil couldn’t discern what had happened at all.</p><p>“So… how did it go?” Phil prompted. </p><p>When Wilbur didn’t answer, Techno took it upon himself to grumble, “His parents finally crossed the line.”</p><p>The breath caught in Phil’s throat. “They what?”</p><p>“His-His mum,” Wilbur took over, a mixture of disgusted and upset. “She… hit him.”</p><p>His last words were barely a whisper. Phil stared at the empty space in the center of the table. Techno slowly set down the fork, and Phil could see the red marks on his hand from gripping it so hard. Wilbur let out a breath, running a hand through his hair. He fell back in his chair and wrapped his arms around himself, gripping his arms tightly. </p><p>“I wanted to go inside with him, but he didn’t want me to,” he continued, unable to stop the flow now that the real issue was out in the open. He sounded so pained, guilty in a way Phil knew he shouldn’t be. “I wanted to help him, protect him but-but I didn’t. And-And I just can’t help but wonder if I went in with him anyways if it would’ve gone differently.”</p><p>“This isn’t your fault,” Phil said instantly, coldly to mute his anger. “This is all on his parents.”</p><p>Three words had never made him feel more angry. <em>She hit him.</em> Phil rubbed at his temples and closed his eyes, releasing a breath. He understood why they wanted to meet in person. This was more serious than he thought. As much as he wanted to storm into that house and yell at the two people inside it who claimed they were Tommy’s parents, that would get them nowhere. They needed to think about this. They had to take the right steps or everything would come crashing down. </p><p>“I’m not letting him back in that house,” Techno said quietly. “Not alone.” </p><p>“No, he can’t keep staying there,” Phil agreed, opening his eyes to look at the boys in front of him. They were so young. They were all so young. They shouldn’t have to deal with this. They weren’t equipped to deal with such awful things, but here they were in a world where they were forced to take problems into their own hands. He let his hands fall from his head, linking his fingers on top of the table. “How’s Tommy now? How is he taking it?”</p><p>“I think he’s trying to not think about it,” Wilbur sighed. He rested his elbows on the table and waved a hand in front of his face as he said, “We had a whole… I don’t know, heart to heart about it last night, so I know it’s bothering him.”</p><p>“Just Tommy trying to seem tougher than he is, like usual. I think he was expecting it, at some point,” Techno sighed. He rubbed a hand across his cheek. “This is so fucked.”</p><p>Phil took a breath. At least he’d talked to Wilbur and Techno about it. Tommy would always harbor his emotions, keep them a secret until they boiled over. Phil wished he’d talk to them more, tell them when he needed help before it got to be too much to hide. He had hoped it wouldn’t come to this, but there wasn’t much hope could do in this situation. Now, they had to make it right. They had to make it better for Tommy in any way they could.</p><p>“Thank you for telling me,” Phil started quietly, garnering the twins’ attention. He reached his hands across the table, taking Techno’s from where it sat balled up next to the fork and waiting for Wilbur to carefully take his other. He told them softly, “We’re gonna work this out. We’re gonna do all we can for Tommy and make sure they can’t hurt him anymore, alright? We’ll do it together, no matter how long it takes. It’s gonna be okay.”</p><p>Wilbur nodded and Techno squeezed his hand. In truth, Phil had almost no idea where he was supposed to go from here. He didn’t have much clue what he could do for Tommy now. He’d start by talking to him, asking how he felt and what he wanted to do. He knew he couldn’t let him go back to that house in good conscience. Wilbur and Techno didn’t have the space to let him live in their apartment forever. Phil remembered the recently converted room in his house, repurposed to house another teen with strained family ties. Maybe he’d have to have another chat with Kristin.</p><p>-</p><p>Ranboo wasn’t always the best with recognizing emotions in other people. He was a little lacking in that area. He couldn’t number the amount of times he thought people were upset with him and was just completely wrong. Today, though, he thought his emotional filter was working okay. Tommy had been acting weird all day. Tubbo had told him about the pallet truck accident yesterday, and initially Ranboo thought he was worrying about that too much, that it was the reason Tommy seemed quieter and less demanding of attention. He could see the repercussions of that clear as day whenever Tommy stood out of a chair or Ranboo saw him walking the halls, he had a limp that was hard to miss. Tommy wouldn’t let something like that bug him for long, so Ranboo had a growing suspicion that something else was going on. </p><p>He and Tommy--well, technically only him, Tommy wasn’t allowed to work but was going anyway--had a shift after school, so they’d parted ways with Tubbo and Purpled after their last class. Tommy’d offered him a ride with him and Wilbur, and he wasn’t about to pass up a chance to not walk to work for once. They were walking to the front of the school at a slow pace. Ranboo wasn’t about to make fun of or make Tommy’s ankle injury worse. Patience was something he had a lot of, so he was more than willing to spare some here. </p><p>He didn’t know if he should bring it up. On one hand, Tommy was his friend and he cared about his well-being, on the other, he didn’t want to overstep his boundaries and make things weird or ruin their friendship entirely. He figured he’d have more to say, spending the night at Wilbur and Techno’s apartment. Ranboo didn’t think he’d hesitate to boast about what they’d done, but Tommy had barely spoken more than he needed to all day. He genuinely seemed troubled over something, and it had Ranboo worried.</p><p>“Door,” Tommy said suddenly, and Ranboo understood why too late. He walked straight into a door, banging his forehead on the glass and leaving a smudge. Tommy cackled as he rubbed his forehead. He couldn’t help but smile at it himself. He’d been so caught up in his thoughts he’d walked into a door. Tommy kicked his foot and asked, “What were you thinkin’ about, anyway? You looked like Tubbo during an english test.” </p><p>“Oh, uh, it's just…” Ranboo trailed off, unsure. Tommy stared up at him expectantly, like he was listening, so he decided to just go for it. “I didn’t know if I should bring it up, but… are you alright? Besides the ankle, I mean. You just… seemed a bit off today, so-so I was wondering if something happened. You don’t have to tell me, but… I’m willing to listen.”</p><p>Tommy froze, hands pressed against the handle to push open the door. He stared down at his feet for a moment, contemplating. Ranboo immediately began to panic, wondering if he crossed that boundary he worried about. Instead of saying anything right away, Tommy pushed out the door, and Ranboo followed right behind him. </p><p>Walking across the cement, Tommy eventually responded, “Sorry to worry you, big man, but… I’m alright. It’s-It’s not anything you need to worry about, anyways. Thanks, though… for asking. I’ll keep it in mind.” </p><p>Ranboo sighed. “Okay, if that’s what you say.” </p><p>Tommy led him down the sidewalk, heading towards one of the last waiting cars. He heard Wilbur before he saw him, when he saw a window roll down and the man’s voice call out, “Hurry the fuck up, I’m gonna use up all my break time!”</p><p>“I’m injured, you stupid bitch, shut up!” Tommy shouted back. Ranboo couldn’t stop himself from laughing at the looks waiting parents gave them from their cars. </p><p>He shoved himself into the back as Tommy claimed the front seat. Wilbur, grinning, reached to ruffle Tommy’s hair before taking off. </p><p>“How was it, still being a child and having to attend school?” he asked.</p><p>“Awful,” Tommy answered.</p><p>“Absolutely miserable,” Ranboo agreed. </p><p>“I am so sorry for you,” Wilbur sighed. </p><p>The car was filled with lighthearted conversation, and Ranboo nearly let his previous talk with Tommy slip his mind. He hadn’t suddenly stopped being worried, but he wouldn’t bring it up again if Tommy didn’t wanna talk about it, especially not in front of Wilbur. It felt wrong to see Tommy acting so… un-Tommy like. He wanted to be able to help, but as with most things, Ranboo didn’t really know how. </p><p>They entered the store through the back, mood light and better than it was five minutes ago. They kept their banter up through storage, waving at others as they passed. But as soon they came to the break room, Ranboo felt as that air was immediately blown away. </p><p>Wilbur led them inside, holding the door open for him and Tommy to enter. There was no one inside, besides Phil, who was sitting at one of the tables staring intensely down at his phone. He looked up when they entered, turning his phone off and setting it face down on the table. Tommy tensed in front of him and looked to Wilbur, looking a lot more frightened than Ranboo thought possible in such a situation. Wilbur just nodded and jutted his head towards Phil.</p><p>“Sorry to kick you out as soon as you got here, Ranboo, but I need to talk to Tommy alone for a bit,” Phil said, his smile gentle and apologetic. </p><p>Ranboo, completely lost and suddenly feeling a lot more justified in his worry, opened and closed his mouth like a fish for a moment. He swallowed and felt like he had to whisper when he said, “O-Okay.”</p><p>Tommy’s eyes were locked on the floor, hands wrapped tight around his backpack straps. Phil looked like he was about to do something he wished he didn’t have to. Wilbur wrapped an arm around Ranboo’s shoulders and guided him out, shutting the door behind them. Ranboo blinked, staring at the door for a few seconds before turning to Wilbur. </p><p>“Okay,” he exhaled slowly, attempting to keep himself calm, “what the heck is going on?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>awooga we're gonna have a time with this fic huh. I hope you all liked it sjdk</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Phil stepped back, leaving a hand on his shoulder. He gave it a squeeze and flashed him a gentle smile. “Let's sit… cause this is gonna be a bit of a chat.” </p><p>He didn’t argue, just followed Phil to the table. He dropped his backpack to the floor and fell similarly into a chair opposite Phil’s. He grumbled, “Do we have to?”</p><p>“Yes, Tommy, we do… and I’m sorry,” Phil added quietly. “This isn’t something we can just sit and wait on until you feel like talking about it. This-This is serious, Tommy.”</p><p>Tommy’s face scrunched up at that. <em>Serious.</em> The word made it feel worse. It made it more real. Part of him was still trying to forget it, like maybe he’d dreamt or imagined it. The other knew it wasn’t. All of yesterday’s events were painfully real. He wouldn’t have been able to remember how it felt so vividly if it wasn’t.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>AYUP!!!! Look at me opening ao3 to post. And to update my chaptered fic no less!! Believe me, I have some good one shot ideas in my newly created ideas doc. But this ain't about that we're having slightly uncomfortable but needed conversations this chapter!!! It ends okay trust me</p><p>But yeah we're still talking about abuse and all that jazz, so be careful if you need to!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Maybe Tommy should have seen this coming. It made sense for Wilbur and Techno to do this, to set up in this way, locked in the break room with Phil. He tightened his grip on his backpack as the door clicked shut behind him, severing any chance of escape. He stared at his feet rather than meet the eyes of the man sitting in front of him. He… He didn’t know what he wanted at that moment. He didn’t know if he wanted to turn and leave or sit and spill it all. Why should Phil have to deal with his problems? He was already leaning on Wilbur and Techno so much. Phil was an actual adult! He had a wife and-and he already helped Ranboo out… he shouldn’t have to take on another charity case. </p><p>Tommy dug his nails into his palms. What did they expect from him? To just admit it? To just let it all out without any reservations? It hurt to admit your parents didn’t care about you. There was a reason Tommy could only think it, and even that he could barely do. </p><p>Phil sighed, and Tommy heard his chair scrape against the floor. He took a breath, and just as he looked up, he was wrapped in an embrace. It didn’t make sense, for a second, then Tommy registered that <em>oh, I’m being hugged.</em> It made him want to cry, but that would be too pathetic. He hung his head instead, burying his face in Phil’s shoulder and returning his hug. Phil’s hugs were different than any type of hug Tommy’s ever gotten. They made you feel secure and grounded, like even if the building was collapsing, it wouldn’t matter because you were being hugged by Phil. The building’s status couldn’t interrupt that, it’d fall around you, and you’d still be fine when it was over. </p><p>“It’s good to see you, mate,” Phil said quietly.</p><p>“Yeah,” Tommy mangled the word. “It’s-It’s good to see you.”</p><p>Phil stepped back, leaving a hand on his shoulder. He gave it a squeeze and flashed him a gentle smile. “Let's sit… cause this is gonna be a bit of a chat.” </p><p>He didn’t argue, just followed Phil to the table. He dropped his backpack to the floor and fell similarly into a chair opposite Phil’s. He grumbled, “Do we have to?”</p><p>“Yes, Tommy, we do… and I’m sorry,” Phil added quietly. “This isn’t something we can just sit and wait on until you feel like talking about it. This-This is serious, Tommy.”</p><p>Tommy’s face scrunched up at that. <em>Serious.</em> The word made it feel worse. It made it more real. Part of him was still trying to forget it, like maybe he’d dreamt or imagined it. The other knew it wasn’t. All of yesterday’s events were painfully real. He wouldn’t have been able to remember how it felt so vividly if it wasn’t. </p><p>“So… I need you to talk to me. Wilbur and Techno told me roughly what happened, so we don’t need to talk about that if you don’t want to,” Phil continued, and when Tommy shook his head signaling no, he had no desire to delve any deeper into his relationship with his parents, he kept going, “What I need you to tell me, then, is what you want to do. Where do <em>you</em> want to go from here? Because we can’t make that decision for you.”</p><p>He balled his fists in his lap. He wanted to forget. He wanted to pretend this never happened. He wanted everyone to stop worrying and go back to living their lives. He never wanted to see his parents again and wanted to go back to that house one more time, just to ensure that they really had no care for him at all. It felt morbid. The thought made him want to throw up. None of it felt right to say. If any of that left his mouth, he thought Phil would just get even more concerned.</p><p>“I don’t know,” he mumbled, settling for the easiest option. “I don’t know what I want.”</p><p>“Then… how do you feel?” Phil asked. Seeing Tommy grimace, he coerced, “Talking about it will clear your head. Maybe then you’ll know what you want.” </p><p>Tommy slid down in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. He stared at the empty space on the table, refusing to meet Phil’s eyes. Why did he have to try so hard to understand? He didn’t want to keep thinking about how his parents-</p><p>He stopped that thought there. He dug his nails into his arms and took a breath. He didn’t want to think about it. Phil wanted to know he felt. Tommy didn’t want to know how to feel. All he knew was that it hurt. His parents didn’t want him unless he was their perfect, model son. But he <em>couldn’t</em> be perfect. He’d never be what others wanted him to be. He would always cause others trouble, whether he wanted to or not. His parents never gave him love, and he was starting to think it was because he didn’t deserve it.</p><p>“Tommy,” Phil’s voice cut in, sharp and expectant.</p><p>“I <em>know!”</em> Tommy exclaimed, pushing his palms into his eyes and sighing loudly. “I fucking <em>know,</em> okay? You want me to talk about my fucking feelings, but <em>I don’t.</em> You all want to help me or whatever, but how the <em>hell</em> are you gonna do that? I’m-I-I don’t even know how to help me!”</p><p>“That’s why I’m here. I want to help you figure it out,” Phil told him, stretching a hand across the table.</p><p>Tommy didn’t take it. He pushed his chair further away from the table. He shouted, “I don’t <em>want</em> to figure it out! It already <em>hurts!</em> I just want to move on. I want the pain to go away.” </p><p>His voice broke at the end, and he felt more pathetic than he had at any point in the last twenty-four hours. He felt <em>weak.</em> It’d been so clear this whole time that his parents didn’t give a shit about him. Having it proven so bluntly was what sucked. He was almost ashamed to have thought they had any scrap of care for him. That’s why it still hurt… because he’d had hope. It was misplaced, but it was hope all the same. </p><p>He felt like shit. He wrapped his arms around himself again, digging his nails in deeper than before. He’d made everyone worry. He even made <em>Ranboo</em> worry, and he usually wouldn’t pick up on an emotional cue unless someone told him it was one. It would be best for all of them if they just let it go. If they could forget about it, life could go back to normal. </p><p>Phil’s hand curled into a fist before pushing flat on the table. He stood from his chair and rounded the table, kneeling on the floor in front of Tommy. He pried his fingers out of his arms and held them tightly in his. He shook their hands slightly, staring down at them intensely. </p><p>“I can’t say I understand what you’re feeling, because I don’t. I understand you’re hurting, though, and I want to help the pain go away. I want to help <em>you,</em> Tommy, and so do so many others, but you have to let us,” Phil told him quietly. “You have to let us in.”</p><p>Tommy bit his lip, squeezing Phil’s hands tightly. He blinked and felt the tears he’d been trying to ignore slide across his skin. He tugged Phil’s hands with his to wipe them away with his knuckles, hiccuping, “I-I know, it’s just--it’s not <em>easy</em> to tell someone <em>’yeah, my parents never loved me,’</em> y’know?” He hiccuped again, sending another wave of saline down his cheeks. “It-It makes you wonder if-if I deserved it. If I was really just… <em>that</em> unlovable.” </p><p>“Oh, Tommy, of course not,” Phil said immediately, shooting to his knees to pull Tommy into a hug, no matter how awkward it was. He held Tommy close, and he was shocked by just how safe he felt once again. Phil continued, voice wavering, “You didn’t deserve an ounce of what your parents did to you, okay? You deserve love and support and everything they didn’t give you. I love you <em>so</em> much. Wil and Techno love you, Tubbo loves you--so many people love and care about you Tommy, and I swear I will tell you everyday if that’s what it takes to get you to believe me.” </p><p>For lack of caring, Tommy let himself slip off his chair, joining Phil knelt on the floor. He melted into his embrace, hunched over and crying into his chest. The break room had always been a weird sort of safe space. It’d seen it’s fair share of mental breakdowns, tired teens, and pointless arguments. He didn’t know where crying in Phil’s arms on the linoleum floor fell. Maybe this was a first. The lockers and the fridge, the cabinets with their hidden bee stickers and the bulletin boards with pictures from every section of the store, they’d been here for it all. Somehow, this had become a constant in Tommy’s life, one he quickly decided he loved more than anything.</p><p>Either way, something was clear to Tommy in that moment: he felt different in the store, here with Phil, with Wilbur and Techno and Tubbo and <em>everyone</em> than how he felt at home. In that house with his parents, every time he stepped out of his room, he felt like he had to hold his breath. He couldn’t remember the last time one of them had hugged him or given him words of praise or encouragement, something that wasn’t backhanded or a cut at his work and how it could’ve been done better or quicker. He could remember how often he’d gotten that type of affection from Wilbur and Techno and Phil. That house he’d grown up in and those people who raised weren’t what home or family were supposed to be. That wasn’t fucking normal. It hurt to admit, every time the realization snuck up on him, it was like the first time he’d figured it out all over again, but it was the truth. His life up until now wasn’t normal at all, but… Tommy thought he could see an opportunity for change. </p><p>“I don’t wanna go back,” he whined quietly, gripping the back of Phil’s shirt a little tighter. “I-I wanna forget it ever happened.”</p><p>Phil sighed, rubbing his back comfortingly. “Forgetting might be hard, but we'll be able to move on. And we would never send you back there, not alone, not ever again.” </p><p>Tommy inhaled and exhaled shakily. He nodded, doing his best to calm himself down and get his stupid fucking tears under control. God, he was fuckin’ tired. He was too soft lately, and maybe that exhaustion was the reason why, but he didn’t care. It was embarrassing. He pushed himself away from Phil, weakly wiping at his eyes. Phil kept his hands on his shoulders, gentle and firm, generally just a grounding presence. </p><p>“You can stay with Wilbur and Techno for a while, but I think you can understand that they can’t keep you in their apartment forever,” Phil stated. When Tommy nodded, still sniffling and rubbing at his eyes, he added, “That’s why I talked with Kristin. You can stay with them for a few more days while we get everything settled, but once we’re all ready, there’ll be a place for you with us.”</p><p>Tommy froze, looking up to meet Phil’s eyes, disbelieving. “Really?” </p><p>Phil nodded, his smile warm and genuine and everything Tommy needed to know this was real. “Really.”</p><p>He launched himself forward, latching his arms around Phil in a hug that was less desperate and more thankful. He muttered weakly, “Thank you.”</p><p>“It’s no problem, Toms,” Phil sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You don’t have to worry. We’re gonna take good care of you from now on.”</p><p>-</p><p>Ranboo’s nerve ends felt electric, like hot energy was running through each of his wires. Something was <em>definitely</em> wrong here, and apparently everyone here but him knew what it was. Tommy looked like he didn’t want to be in that room with Phil, and that was about as far from normal as things could get. He searched Wilbur’s face for any hint of what was going on, but could only decipher a blatantly obvious guilt. Wilbur sighed, turning away from the break room and running a hand through his hair. </p><p>“Look, Ranboo, its-its complicated,” Wilbur huffed. </p><p>“I can handle complicated, Wilbur, trust me,” Ranboo commented dryly. “Tommy’s been weird all day, and not just because of the ankle. If it was only that bothering him, he’d complain more. Tubbo told me what happened yesterday, but… what happened after you guys left?”</p><p>“I-” Wilbur started, looking concerned and hesitant at the same time, like he wanted to tell Ranboo whatever was going on but something held him back, “-I can’t. It’s not something you have to worry about.”</p><p>“Just saying that’s not gonna make me any less concerned,” Ranboo pushed, emotions taking control of his words. “I-I know I’m not as close to Tommy as the rest of you are but… he’s still my friend. I just wanna help… if I can.”</p><p>Wilbur heaved another sigh, rubbing his eyes as if a world’s worth of exhaustion just crashed over him. Ranboo didn’t really know what was making him feel so strongly about this. When Tubbo told him Tommy’d been losing sleep because of pressure from his parents, something just clicked inside him. A feeling of dark understanding had settled in his chest. Parent relationships were… rough, to say the least. Ranboo liked to think he’d be able to make a weight like that a little less heavy, if given the chance. </p><p>“Well, I guess if everything works out you’ll find out soon enough,” Wilbur muttered through his hands. He huffed, looking up to meet Ranboo’s eyes. “Let's talk somewhere else. And find Techno.” </p><p>Ranboo nodded, following Wilbur’s lead as they left the break room behind. He felt uneasy leaving Tommy during such a tentative situation, but he didn’t have much choice at the moment. He’d gotten tense, he realized, as they pushed out of the back and into the store proper. The atmosphere was very different from what it was seconds before. The workers and customers in the store ambled amiably on, blissfully unaware of how much a troubled teen was struggling in the backrooms. He hadn’t been able to drop off his backpack, so he gripped its straps a little bit tighter, a little more anxious than he was before. He kept his eyes on the floor, keeping his mouth sealed tight as others passed them and said their ‘hellos’. He followed the back of Wilbur’s heels, too focused on what he was doing to respond when Fundy and Eret greeted them. </p><p>He nearly ran into Wilbur, not realizing he’d stopped. He planted his feet <em>way</em> too hard to avoid slamming into Wilbur’s back and inadvertently drew the attention of who Wilbur was staring at. Techno looked up from where he was restocking grapes and stared at Ranboo for a good five seconds before turning his attention to Wilbur. Ranboo could tell some kind of silent conversation was happening in front of him, but he did not share the twin wavelength. Techno huffed, dropping one last bag of grapes on a shelf before stepping away to join them. </p><p>“C’mon,” he grumbled, taking the lead from Wilbur, “we’ll go somewhere private.”</p><p>Ranboo returned his attention to the tiled floor, glancing up every once in a while to make sure he was keeping up. His thoughts were racing too fast for him to try and listen to Wilbur and Techno’s whispered conversation. Surprisingly, it sounded slightly heated. Ranboo really hoped he wasn’t pushing his luck. He felt like he was inserting himself into something he wasn’t supposed to know about. Wilbur said he’d learn eventually, but… it didn’t make this feel any less wrong. He wanted to help Tommy, he really did, he just… hoped this was the right way to do it. </p><p>He followed the twins to the back of the produce department, swinging through some corridors before reaching the freezer. Ranboo’d never felt the need to use it, but he knew people came back here for some alone time or to release their frustrations. He guessed since the break room was occupied, this was the next best thing. Techno pulled the pink sticky note from the wall across from the door and attached it to the metal, signifying it was in use. He followed Wilbur inside, standing awkwardly off to the side as Techno shut the door behind them. The cold got to him almost immediately, making him wrap his arms around himself for warmth rather than nerves. The chill also hid the shaking of his hands, so he called that a plus to this potentially, most likely horrible situation. </p><p>He leaned back against one of the shelves, trying to build up the courage to look up. He wanted this. Why was he so hesitant now? The dread he’d felt before had spiraled and grew in his stomach since they first arrived at the break room. Now, he couldn’t tell if he was more scared or curious to learn what the heck was going on. </p><p>Wilbur sighed, mussing up the front of his hair restlessly. He started slowly, “So, you said Tommy’s been acting weird all day and you saw… that, so, you know something’s wrong.”</p><p>“Yeah,” Ranboo croaked, swallowing the tightness in his throat and trying again, “yeah, I-I think I do. So… something really did happen?”</p><p>The silence that question was met with wasn’t exactly comforting. It told him the answer clear as day: yes, something had happened, and Ranboo couldn’t help but assume the worst. Though, he didn’t really know what the worst was in this situation. His mind could wander as many dark paths as it wanted, but Ranboo decided he would rather not let it.</p><p>“Yeah, it's… its parent related,” Wilbur managed to supply. “You know how they… aren’t the best.”</p><p>It looked like this physically pained him to talk about, and Ranboo felt even worse about making them talk about it. Wilbur turned to Techno for aid, locking eyes with him pleadingly. Techno stared back at him for a moment before huffing and giving in. He looked to the shelf beside Ranboo instead of directly at him, but faced him nonetheless. </p><p>“His mom took it too far when we let him go inside to get his things,” Techno explained bluntly. </p><p>Ranboo’s mind blanked. He blinked, loosening his grip on his arms slightly. “Took it too far? What-What do you mean?”</p><p>Both brothers looked unwilling to come forward with that information. The wound was still fresh, Ranboo realized. They’d been there when it happened. This hurt them as much as it hurt Tommy. He pushed off the shelf, not able to stop himself from hauling it towards the door.</p><p>“Listen, I-I’m sorry, it isn’t right of me to just shove myself into this. You-You don’t have to tell me, really-” he spouted. His hand was on the handle, the only thing keeping him in place was the hand on his other wrist. He twisted to meet Wilbur’s eyes. They… They were filled with enough emotion that Ranboo couldn’t look into them for longer than a second. He averted his gaze to Wilbur’s hand on his wrist and let his other hand slip from the door handle. </p><p>“It's okay, Ranboo, don’t beat yourself up about it,” Wilbur told him, carefully releasing his wrist. “I-I know you’re just doing this because you care and, well… everyone’s probably gonna find it out sooner or later. I think you deserve to hear it.”</p><p>Ranboo released a breath, nodding curtly. “Okay, if you’re sure.”</p><p>“I am,” Wilbur insisted. He took a step back and crossed his arms over his chest, tossing the ball back to Techno with a glance. </p><p>The man pushed up his glasses to rub at his eyes and continued, “So, his mother… did something really bad. I don’t want you to freak out, so just know that we’re taking care of it, okay? You don’t have to worry about that, you can focus on just… being there for Tommy, alright?”</p><p>Ranboo nodded, heart racing nervously. “Alright.”</p><p>Techno took a breath. Wilbur moved infinitesimally closer to him, lightly bumping the shoulders together in a sign of support. Ranboo tightened his grip on his backpack straps again. The world was frozen inside the freezer, waiting for Techno to say the words that would finally make something about this tense situation change. </p><p>“Tommy’s mom-” Techno exhaled, “-hit him. She-She hit him. We… haven’t gotten him to say anything more than that.” </p><p>Ranboo stood stock still. Tommy’s mom had… What the heck. <em>What the heck.</em> This was so bad. This was so, horribly bad. Tommy’s <em>mom</em> had-</p><p>“But we’re looking after him, now. We’re not letting him do anything that could put him in danger like that again,” Wilbur followed up. He stepped close enough to Ranboo to put a hand on his shoulder. He tilted his head slightly to look up into his face. “Ranboo? Can you say something so I know you’re breathing?” </p><p>His breath came out in a rush, quickly followed by his mouth saying words before he thought about them. “She-She did- How? <em>Why?”</em></p><p>“Tommy’s parents have always been way too hard on him. They’re basically the entire reason he’s so stressed all the time,” Techno explained spitefully. “I knew one day the pin would drop, but-but I didn’t think it’d happen like this.” </p><p>“Oh, oh, wow,” Ranboo breathed, though it felt like he wasn’t breathing at all. “This-This is really bad.” </p><p>Ranboo had been watching Tommy all day. He wanted to make sure he got to his classes on time and that his ankle didn’t bother him too much. He wanted to ask him if something else was on his mind. He wanted to ask if he was okay. Ranboo nearly brushed it off, nearly decided not to tread further than he usually would and treat today like it was a normal day. But he hadn’t. He’d pushed Wilbur for information, and now that he had it, he wasn’t sure how much he wanted it. Tommy’s mom had hi-<em>hurt</em> him. On purpose. He’d asked Tommy if he was alright like it’d be a small issue. No wonder he didn’t want to talk about it. This-This was-</p><p>Suddenly, he realized his chest hurt. He didn’t know why he was struggling to just inhale, but he felt way too tense to be able to make his body relax. Luckily, Wilbur seemed to pick up on this. He pried Ranboo’s hands from his backpack straps and held them tightly in his. Ranboo looked up to meet his eyes, hyper aware of how much air was not entering his lungs. Frightened. Worried. Upset. That’s what he saw mirrored back at him.</p><p>“It’s alright, okay? Tommy’s not in danger. He’s got me and Phil and Techno and now you, too, all looking after him,” Wilbur told him, speaking plainly and clearly, making sure Ranboo heard and understood him. “Phil is talking to him right now in the break room about what he wants to do going forward. You’re right here in this cold ass freezer with me and Techno. Tommy’s safe and so are you. Take a deep breath with me, alright? C’mon, inhale… and exhale…” </p><p>Somehow, Ranboo got his lungs to unfreeze and follow Wilbur’s example. Having something solid to follow along with and cling to helped, he had to admit. He wasn’t gonna complain, because after a few more breaths, his chest stopped hurting. The initial panic and fear he felt had gone and made room for a low, boiling anger. </p><p>“Its-Its not <em>right,”</em> Ranboo spoke lowly, squeezing Wilbur’s hands. “Tommy doesn’t deserve that.” </p><p>“No, he doesn’t,” Wilbur agreed, matching his tone.</p><p>“How-How could his mom feel justified in that? How could she be so fine with just-” Ranboo snapped his mouth shut, feeling his throat tighten up at the thought of saying it out loud. He continued meakly, “It's not okay.” </p><p>“Some people just suck,” Techno grumbled, kicking a box and watching it slide across the floor. “They can’t be reasoned with. Those people happen to be Tommy’s parents.” </p><p>“They make me so…” Wilbur let go of Ranboo’s hands and stormed halfway across the freezer, pulling at his hair slightly before throwing his hands to the air and shouting, “pissed off! They had no right to treat Tommy--their <em>son--</em>like that! How shit of a person do you have to be to think doing that’s okay?!” </p><p>“You have to barely be a person at all,” Techno grumbled. “More of a monster.” </p><p>“I am not the type to get mad easily, but this just makes me want to scream,” Ranboo thought out loud. </p><p>He blinked. <em>Scream.</em> </p><p>“Hey, guys,” he started, effectively garnering the attention of the twins, “don’t you think we should use the freezer for its intended purpose?” </p><p>They stared at him blankly, lost at the proposal. Wilbur was the one to ask, “What do you mean?”</p><p>Ranboo gripped the straps of his backpack once more. They were fraying and falling apart, but they could take a few more angry tugs. He braced his feet on the floor, tilted back as he inhaled, and leaned forward as he let out the loudest scream of his entire life. His throat <em>hurt,</em> but he had way too many pent up emotions to care. Being a teen in high school with as many problems as he had fucking <em>sucked.</em> Homework stressed him out, classmates were rude to him for no reason, his parents were never around, his friends were as messed up and broken as he was, and none of them deserved a single bit of it. He was <em>mad</em> about it. And he thought he was rightfully so.</p><p>He glanced up to see Wilbur and Techno frozen in shock, their mouths agape. Wilbur’s slowly morphed into an understanding grin. He tucked his arms in close to his sides, braced his legs, and let out a resounding, “FUCK!” </p><p>Ranboo burst into laughter, falling back against the door. It sent a shock of cold through his body, but he didn’t care. They both looked to Techno expectantly, where the man gazed between them hopelessly. </p><p>“You two are crazy,” he drawled. He closed his eyes, took a breath, and let out a yell that was similar but somehow more high-pitched than Ranboo’s. </p><p>Another insane bout of laughter bubbled out of his mouth, this time accompanied by Wilbur. The man continued to strut around the freezer, shouting cuss words to the heavens to his heart’s content. Ranboo covered his mouth with both hands, a futile attempt to stop his ceaseless giggling. Techno couldn’t help but huff a laugh, joining in with the occasional swear. This wasn’t how this moment was supposed to be. Nothing was okay. They were <em>so</em> far from okay. The hysterics and the cocktail of emotions were getting to them, he guessed. That was the only reason they could laugh in such a situation. </p><p>That scream didn’t change a lot. Ranboo was still pissed at Tommy’s parents. He was upset with himself for treating this so lightly before. He felt guilty for making Wilbur and Techno talk about it when it clearly hurt them. But that scream did provide a temporary relief from it all. A pure, untainted, untested show of his frustrations. In fact, it worked so well, Ranboo thought it was worth it to release another one.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>the freezer lore comes into play and we welcome it with open arms!! I wish you all the best of days and nights and I hope you're doing well. I've been busy with college work lately, so the inspiration and the time I have to write has been low. I still want to write more, but it'll probably be slow for a while. Still, love you all and I promise more content will be coming &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After what happened in the warehouse yesterday, Tubbo’d had a strange and terrible lingering taste in his mouth. He couldn’t figure out why. It wasn’t exactly out of place for all the episodes they’d had. He felt squirmish and guilty, like he couldn’t look Tommy in the eye without seeing some form of disappointment. It kept its cold hand on the back of Tubbo’s neck all throughout the day. He still felt it’s fingers on his skin. He had to admit, it had done its job well. He wasn’t able to meet Tommy’s gaze at any point during school. He clenched his comforter in his fingers, tensing up with a sudden spike of anxiety. Was it his fault? Did he make Tommy think he didn’t care somehow? That’s why he hadn’t told him what was wrong?</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>how do you all feel about a heart to heart with the minors? watch me ping around POVs like a pinball machine</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Tubbo holed himself up in his room to focus on homework for the night, he didn’t think he’d be so distracted. This time of night was meant for focus and getting things done, but apparently that was going to be the last thing he was doing. He’d done about three and a half problems of his algebra in the past hour, and that was not the pace he needed to actually get the worksheet done. He groaned and gently bonked his head against his desk, very much on the verge of giving up. </p><p>He’d brushed it off all day. He noticed Tommy was off. A sprained ankle wouldn’t dampen his energy as much as it seemed to, but he’d ignored it, because surely nothing bad would’ve happened with Wilbur and Techno. Surely not. They wouldn’t let anything bad happen. They’d ensure Tommy had the best night known to sixteen year olds with overbearing parents. Or they’d at least make sure he ate and got enough sleep for once. Even though Tubbo knew that, the signs were still there. He couldn’t let go of the possibility that <em>something</em> had happened that somehow made yesterday’s events worse and Tommy, being the idiot he was, hid everything from him. Not just him, but Ranboo and Purpled too. He was just that type of person; the type of person who bottled up their emotions to keep others from worrying about them. He never seemed to realize that it just made them all worry more. </p><p>Tubbo sat himself up and pushed his chair away from his desk. He stood, moved the two feet from his chair to his bed, and collapsed on top of the comforter. It wasn’t that he didn’t expect it, he just never expected it to hurt. Tommy did this type of thing all the time--an amount that was definitely unhealthy--but he never hid things from Tubbo. They never kept secrets. Of course there were some things Tommy would always hesitate to say or talk about, but he always came around. That was what they did. They talked it out. Whatever was on their mind, they knew the other would listen. Tommy had a bad habit of thinking he had to protect Tubbo, whether it be physically or emotionally, it didn’t matter; he did it. Tubbo didn’t need it. He knew he didn’t. He could understand why Tommy did it, though, because he had the exact same complex for him.</p><p>After what happened in the warehouse yesterday, Tubbo’d had a strange and terrible lingering taste in his mouth. He couldn’t figure out why. It wasn’t exactly out of place for all the episodes they’d had. He felt squirmish and guilty, like he couldn’t look Tommy in the eye without seeing some form of disappointment. It kept its cold hand on the back of Tubbo’s neck all throughout the day. He still felt it’s fingers on his skin. He had to admit, it had done its job well. He wasn’t able to meet Tommy’s gaze at any point during school. He clenched his comforter in his fingers, tensing up with a sudden spike of anxiety. Was it his fault? Did he make Tommy think he didn’t care somehow? That’s why he hadn’t told him what was wrong?</p><p>The gross feeling of the grease and tar of shame and guilt slithered down his spine. He shot up, scrambling across his bed towards his side table. He’d left his phone there to charge, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to call Tommy and apologize for whatever he could’ve done. He wanted to help Tommy. He <em>needed</em> to help him, or he’d never forgive himself. The last thing he wanted was to leave his best friend in pain. </p><p>He fumbled with his passcode, getting it right on the third try and quickly opening his contacts. Tommy’d set his name in Tubbo’s contacts himself and insisted that he wasn’t allowed to change it under any circumstances. It’d made it easy to find, Tubbo had to admit. Scrolling until he saw <em>BIG MAN TOMMY CAREFUL DANGER KRAKEN INNIT</em> wasn’t hard, building up the courage to actually hit the call button was. Tubbo slumped back against his headboard, grimacing at the blurry snapshot of Tommy he’d set as the contact picture. What happened to the confidence and urgency he’d had moments ago? Why did it always have to be so feeble?</p><p>Tubbo jumped, feeling his phone vibrate in his hand. He stared wide eyed at the alert for a moment. <strong>BIG MAN TOMMY CAREFUL DANGER KRAKEN INNIT and 1 more</strong> <em>FaceTime call from BIG MAN TOMMY…</em></p><p>He sighed, quickly rubbing at his eyes and steeling himself. He guessed he didn’t have time to be scared and unsure. It was very Tommy-like to interrupt his spiral, even when he didn’t know he was doing so. Tubbo took one last breath and answered the call. </p><p>-</p><p>Purpled wasn’t the sentimental type. He cared for his friends, yeah, he wouldn’t lie about that. They just… didn’t get that deep or emotional. It wasn’t his thing. He wouldn’t turn someone away if they came to him with a problem or something, he wasn’t that coldhearted, he just… had trouble reciprocating. In comparison to emotional stuntedness, he’d say his only competition was Techno. He’d come to accept this as fact: that he’d struggle with this sort of expression for the rest of his life. He was good at joking, he was good at his brand of sarcastic comedy and teasing insults. He didn’t know what to say when it came to real talks of personal truths and feelings. If you asked him how his day was, he would say “fine.” He didn’t know how to say otherwise. </p><p>He may have struggled in the emotions department, but his friends sure didn’t. They were open and honest in a way that made Purpled slightly worried. It was only in that group, he’d noticed, where there were no holds barred. He didn’t understand why he was included there. He had nothing to contribute. They talked and he listened and they vented and he listened and they felt like family but he just <em>listened</em>. His support was weak and he never said anything of his own. He tried not to think about it, because it just made him confused. He attributed it to their scary amount of openness instead of letting himself think about it any deeper. </p><p>It was thanks to those multidimensional moments where the world seemed to freeze while they let their hearts bleed on their wrists that Purpled could pinpoint each time something went wrong. He’d noticed it as soon as he saw Tommy walk into their history class that morning. He wasn’t okay, but Purpled didn’t ask--he never asked--about it. He saw the exact moment later when, right in the middle of algebra, Tubbo turned to Tommy and opened his mouth to ask him a question and <em>hesitated.</em> He resigned himself from that decision and turned to his other side, quietly asking Ranboo what questions they were supposed to do for homework instead. Again, Purpled kept it to himself. He spotted it again at the end of the day, after the last bell had rung, as he exchanged his textbooks for his tennis equipment. As he shut his locker and slung his backpack over his shoulder, he watched Ranboo down the hall, fingers gripping the top of his locker as he eyed Tommy with more concern than Purpled thought his heart could manage. Purpled had turned the other way, opting to push outside toward the tennis court instead of getting involved.</p><p>Alone in his room, staring at the ceiling, Purpled ran through each scene over and over again. He analyzed them each for the exact second where he could have said or done something. He could have taken the step, could have chosen to be vulnerable and <em>open,</em> but he hadn’t. He closed himself off, just like he always did. He pushed his palms into his eyes, releasing a sigh. What even stopped him in the first place? Was it pride? Fear? Whatever name it had, it disgusted him. These were supposed to be his friends, so why was he always so reluctant to just <em>get close?</em> They had no restraints around him, why shouldn’t he give them the same treatment?</p><p>Part of him whispered from the darkest corners of his heart, <em>Are you sure you care about them as much as you think you do?</em> He almost felt nauseous, almost. It had always been a fear of his, one he knew was there but refused to acknowledge. Purpled didn’t <em>know</em> what he was supposed to feel. That was the problem. He didn’t know if he was allowed to have such good friends or let people care about him. He’d had his moments, with Punz and Ponk and the others, but he always felt weird afterward. It was such a foreign concept, loving someone and feeling that same love reciprocated back. A slow realization started to dawn on him, making the strange sensation of oncoming tears come close to bursting behind his eyes. Maybe he wasn’t as mentally healthy as he thought he was. </p><p>The vibration of his phone on his stomach made him flinch. He swiped his palms over his eyes and scooped up his phone, blinking away the bleariness to squint and read the notification. <strong>Tommy and 1 more</strong> <em>FaceTime call from Tommy.</em></p><p>At first, he wondered if the universe was playing a sick joke on him, facing him with the friends he’d been worrying about moments ago. He blinked, listening to the vibration of his phone against his hand. He was worrying about his friends. He took a breath and shoved himself up, sitting straight. He wasn’t completely coldhearted. Maybe he could give being open a try. </p><p>-</p><p>The rest of Ranboo’s shift felt like the equivalent of sinking into a pool of quicksand. It all seemed too long and like the world might be ending. He wouldn’t know for another two hours when his feet hit the bottom, then he’d see if his head would be above the surface, able to breathe, or if he’d be completely submerged. He survived to the end of his shift, where he finally saw Tommy again. He didn’t look too bad, but Ranboo could tell that he’d cried. People who had cried long and hard about something had a different posture, a quieter and softer demeanor than they usually did. This was extremely noticeable on Tommy, and even more so when he only flashed Ranboo a small smile before falling into the back of Wilbur’s car. </p><p>He’d been staying at Phil’s recently, since his parents were gone on a new venture for work. It was on the car ride home where he learned Wilbur, Techno, and Tommy would be coming over later for dinner. They were going back to their apartment to freshen up and let Tommy get the things he’d left there. Tommy’d be staying the night with them, and unless things changed for some reason, he’d keep staying there. If anything, Ranboo was relieved. It’d definitely be awkward, learning how to live with Tommy, but they’d make it work. They’d figure it out eventually. He hoped it didn’t take too long. Nothing had changed about him wanting to be there for Tommy. Part of him had a feeling that the friendship process was about to be expedited. </p><p>It was only after Ranboo had showered did he hear more voices downstairs. He thought he’d be able to recognize Wilbur and Techno’s voices from anywhere, now. What was strange was not hearing Tommy’s. Walking from the bathroom to his room meant going to the opposite end of the hallway, which meant passing the last open guest room, which he guessed wasn’t a guest room anymore. The door was slightly open, a sliver just big enough for Ranboo to get a glimpse inside as he passed. He froze in the doorway, heartbeat picking up the longer he stood and stared. </p><p>Tommy sat on the floor, back pressed against the side of the bed. He looked troubled, pensive, sitting with his knees pulled up to his chest. His backpack and a half-emptied duffel bag laid abandoned on the bed. In the dim light of dusk, most of the light in the room came from Tommy’s phone, highlighting his features and the stressed gleam in his eyes. He stared at it like it held the potential to hurt him. It felt private, like something Ranboo shouldn’t be seeing but couldn’t help but watch now that he’d seen it at all. </p><p>He slowly lowered the towel from his head where he’d been in mid-drying motion. He stepped away from the door and continued to his room, releasing the breath he’d been holding as soon as he stepped in the door. He dropped the towel at his feet and took a breath. He needed a minute. He needed to reset. He knew what had happened. He could tell Tommy was struggling. He could help. <em>He could help.</em> He could be a good friend and be there and support Tommy when he needed it. Might as well try and start off on the right foot. </p><p>Ranboo stepped back out of his room, shutting the door as quietly as possible behind him. He padded back down the hall, hearing more buzzing in his ears than conversation from downstairs. He paused in front of Tommy’s door with a hand raised in the air, poised to knock. God, he was scared. The scariest thing in the world was the possibility that the step he was about to take was the wrong one. How would Tommy receive him? Would he accept his help and company or just shout at him to piss off, betrayed that he’d even pried that far into his personal information just to learn that his mom-</p><p>A groan from inside the room stopped Ranboo’s train of thought then and there. They weren’t at the station, but he thought he’d rather be in the middle of nowhere than whatever platform that train would be leaving him at. He tilted his head to peer through the crack. Tommy had his head in his hands, phone abandoned at his feet. The screen still shined brightly, showing the start of a conversation yet to be sent. Something about it made Ranboo’s heart twinge painfully. With a rush of determination, he knocked on the door. Tommy’s head snapped up as Ranboo stepped inside, he relaxed as Ranboo closed the door behind him. He crossed the room to slide down and sit beside him. They sat in silence for a moment, both staring at the abandoned conversation at their feet. From here, Ranboo could see the two contacts it included: Tubbo and Purpled. And it wasn’t a text conversation, it was a FaceTime call.</p><p>“Don’t know where to start?” Ranboo asked minutely. </p><p>“No idea,” Tommy mumbled. He rubbed his cheek and asked, “Did they tell you? That I’m-”</p><p>“Staying here?” Ranboo finished. When Tommy nodded, he continued, “Yeah, they did.”</p><p>Tommy swallowed. His voice shook slightly when he questioned, “Did they tell you why?”</p><p>Ranboo sighed, something filled with pain and pity, something pissed and pleading at the same time. He answered, “Yeah, yeah they did.”</p><p>Tommy released a breath. He laughed uneasily, rubbing his eyes as he commented, “Makes this a bit easier on me, then.”</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Ranboo blurted, digging his fingers into the hem of his shirt. “I didn’t know and I treated it so casually when I asked you earlier, I just--I feel bad. You-You didn’t deserve… that.”</p><p>Sometimes silence was deafening. Tommy’s phone shut off at their feet, leaving them in near darkness. He couldn’t see it, but he heard Tommy sniffle. It felt like nothing. Words felt meaningless in this haze of dusk they sat in. Nothing felt real in the way that things were too real, unfortunately real. He wished time would reverse, would take them back to a time where everything didn’t hurt so much. The world moved again when he felt Tommy’s arm brush past his leg. Suddenly, there was light, as Tommy powered on his phone. Ranboo could see his watery eyes and flushed cheeks now. He could see how everything was still tender and sore.</p><p>“Thanks, Ranboo,” he mumbled, “but I’ll-I’ll be alright. I think. It just-” he took a breath, “-It just hurts. A lot.” Another pause. He swallowed a wave of emotion Ranboo could see him hold back. Tommy stared at his phone, eyeing Tubbo and Purpled’s names with uncertainty. Ranboo could see his hands shaking in the small amount of light. He continued, rushed and scared, “You-You aren’t on too well with your parents either, are you? Do you… Does it hurt? For you?”</p><p>“So much,” Ranboo answered instantly. His voice tightened, thinking about it made talking about it leagues harder, <em>”So</em> much, but-but it hasn’t hurt as much, lately. It gets easier when you realize other people care for you in the way they didn’t. Phil and Kristin are… so kind. Everyone at the store looks out for us, y’know, it-its nice. To feel cared for.”</p><p>“It is,” Tommy agreed, voice thick, “but-but that doesn’t solve everything. How do you even--What am I supposed to do now? Just move on? Just accept that my parents don’t care about me?”</p><p>“No, no one’s asking you to do that,” Ranboo told him. “It sucks. It sucks more than anything else ever could, but… you learn to live with it. It’s not easy. I don’t know if I know how to live with it. I don’t think I do. Its-Its a process. It’s hard and it hurts, but it's something we have to do.”</p><p>Tommy scoffed, dropping his phone in his lap to furiously wipe at his eyes. He angrily declared, “It’s stupid! It’s fucking unfair and stupid and-and why should I have to do that? Why do I have to do any of this at all?”</p><p>“I-I don’t know, Tommy,” Ranboo answered, voice cracking, pressure building. “I wish I knew.” </p><p>“How are we supposed to deal with this shit?” Tommy asked weakly, tilting his head back against the bed. “We’re-We’re sixteen, what are we meant to do about it?” He took a breath. He leaned forward and looked up at Ranboo with the same watery eyes that had yet to break. “How do you make it easier?”</p><p>“You cry,” Ranboo’s voice broke, honest and hurt, feeling and understanding the exact disbelief and struggle Tommy did. He nodded his head, tears finally breaking free as he repeated, “You cry.” </p><p>In the last seconds of light from Tommy’s phone, Ranboo watched as tears streaked down his cheeks. He watched as Tommy broke, as he hid his face in his arms and curled up on himself. He watched his shoulders shake with sobs until they disappeared in the dark. Ranboo tilted to the side, leaning his shoulder against Tommy’s as he hiccupped and fruitlessly wiped the tears from his eyes. Tommy was right. It was unfair. There was no reason they should have to deal with this, but they did. They were the unlucky ones who were destined to suffer. Nothing about it was right or okay, but it was their lives. It was what they lived with and would continue to live with until they could truly be their own people again. Ranboo’s morbid sense of hope flared in his chest with the determination to <em>live,</em> with the desire to prove the world wrong and show that he was strong enough to make it through this. He hoped that same hope burned inside of Tommy, and if it didn’t, he’d put it there himself. </p><p>Ranboo managed to compose himself, breaths still uneven and eyes still hurting, but better. He stayed pressed against Tommy’s side, keeping him company as he cried. Sometimes that's all you could do to make it better. Sometimes you just had to wait it out. And Ranboo knew he’d be here when it was over. He’d be a friend, a grounding presence, something to pull Tommy back from what had the capability to swallow him whole. </p><p>-</p><p>The world eventually came back to Tommy. He could feel Ranboo’s shoulder pressed against his, could hear his own breath in his ears, could feel the pain in his chest subsiding. <em>You cry.</em> It felt like all Tommy had done was cry, but this was different. This felt cathartic, not like a temporary solution to a bigger, longer lasting problem. When he could breathe again, he felt okay. He felt like he could take it. He believed, more than he had at any point, that he could get better. Moving on felt more possible, and the fact that he had friends and found family to help him through it felt more clear. </p><p>He inhaled deeply, exhaled for a few seconds, and felt steadier. He weakly jostled Ranboo, making him jump and stare at him with wide eyes. Tommy grinned at how easy it was to startle him, feeling soft when it made Ranboo smile too. He picked his phone back up as he said, “Thanks, big man.”</p><p>“No problem, Tommy,” Ranboo replied. He eyed Tommy’s phone as he asked, “Gonna make that call?”</p><p>“Yeah, I think I am,” Tommy answered.</p><p>“Want me to stay?” Ranboo asked permission. </p><p>“Uh… yeah… please,” Tommy granted it. </p><p>Ranboo slid around on the carpet, sitting in front of Tommy instead of beside him. He sat with his lanky legs criss crossed, pushing his hands in his lap to sit up straight. He stared right in Tommy’s eyes when he said, “If you get overwhelmed or just need a minute, look at me. I’m your moral support from this point on.”</p><p>“Okay,” Tommy responded, mouth dry. He nodded quickly, mumbled a soft, “Thank you,” and turned his attention back to his phone. It was too dark in this room. He reached up and turned on the lamp, sure he looked like shit and now he was just letting Tubbo and Purpled see it better. He considered turning it back off, but that would just be weirder. He sighed, pressing his hands into his cheeks. He was stalling. He fully well knew that. He just had to do it. Just had to start the call and it’d be simple from there. He hoped.</p><p>He pressed the button. He started the call. It rang, and it rang, and it rang. He waited, chewing his bottom lip anxiously. Then, it stopped. There was an answer. He sat straighter, watching as Tubbo and then Purpled’s faces came into view. He watched recognition settle on their faces as they got oriented. Yeah, he definitely looked like shit. </p><p>“Tommy?” Tubbo started, a vague disbelief in his voice. “What-What happened?”</p><p>“Uh, I-I needed to talk to you guys,” Tommy answered, scratching his arm restlessly. “There’s something I think you should know.”</p><p>It was quiet. He watched Tubbo sit back, expression hardening as he nodded and softly mumbled, “Okay.” Purpled nodded stiffly, followed by a sincere, “We’re listening.”</p><p>Tommy took a breath, and he talked. He did it hesitantly, with sudden halts and at some points struggling to say what he needed, but he did it. He told them what he’d been through. Every now and then, he saw Ranboo react on the edge of his vision. He’d wince or frown or do something that made Tommy realize how serious this was all over again. When he finished, they were all silent, like no one wanted to break the fragile bonds on which they all sat. He glanced up at Ranboo to be met with encouraging eyes and a reassuring nod. Then, Tubbo spoke.</p><p>-</p><p>“Tommy, I’m so sorry,” he began, words spilling out faster than his brain could catch up to them. “I should’ve said something. I noticed you weren’t feeling well, but I was scared I’d done something that made you not want to tell me what was wrong so I avoided it, I-I’m sorry, Tommy, I really am.”</p><p>Tubbo felt awful. He felt like the worst person in the world, the biggest disgrace he could’ve ever been. He’d noticed Tommy was hurting. It was so clear and right in front of him, but he’d held back because he was afraid. His best friend had been <em>abused</em> and he hadn’t had the guts to ask him if he was okay. Tubbo felt like shit, he felt so bad he couldn’t stand it.</p><p>Tommy’s eyes were wide, sounding worried when he said, “What? No, I just--I didn’t know how to tell you, it-it felt like a lot--it still does. I… I didn’t wanna throw it on you and make you worry about me even more.”</p><p>“I’ve been worrying about you all night!” Tubbo exclaimed exasperatedly, dropping his phone on his bed to hide his face in his hands. “I was-I was just trying to build up the <em>courage</em> to call you when-when you-”</p><p>The words rolled off his tongue like bile, bitter and disgusting in their bluntness. He’d been worried about <em>himself</em> when Tommy had just gone through something truly <em>awful.</em> It made his cheeks burn and his eyes ache, anger and guilt mixing to make something terrible, something that would burn him if it boiled over. </p><p>“God, it’s so selfish of me, I-I’m sorry, Tommy, I’ve been such a shit friend,” Tubbo apologized through his hands. </p><p>“Tubbo, no, don’t-don’t say that. It’s not your fault, you didn’t know,” Tommy hurried to say, voice cracking miserably. Tubbo peered out from between his fingers, feeling hot tears escape through the cracks. How could Tommy be so kind--look so concerned--when Tubbo had been such an awful friend? He met Tommy’s watery eyes as he repeated, “You didn’t know. I’m sorry I made you worry so much, I-I should’ve just told you.” </p><p>Tubbo was saved from trying to respond. Purpled broke out of his shocked expression, blinking and revealing a face etched with sympathy. </p><p>-</p><p>“That’s not something that’s easy to say,” Purpled began, not understanding where the words were coming from but trusting his gut. He tangled his fingers in his comforter, building up confidence as he continued, “It-It takes a lot of courage to come forward and tell someone something like that… and a lot of trust. I totally understand why you hesitated, so… Thank you for telling us, Tommy. It means a lot.” </p><p>“Y-Yeah!” Tubbo added, wiping his sleeve across his eyes and snatching his phone back up. “I got all angry at myself, but, really, thank you for letting us in, Tommy. We’re-We’ll do what we can to make it better, yeah?” </p><p>Purpled’s mouth felt dry. He wanted to try. Tommy was struggling, which was probably an understatement, and he needed support. Purpled could be open. If there was any time to start, now was as good as ever. Now was the time to show he cared. </p><p>“Yeah, of course,” Purpled forced his mouth to work, forced emotion into it to show he felt something real. “We’ll help you out as much as we can.” </p><p>Tommy looked lost for words, looked like he expected some other response. Purpled had no idea what he was thinking. Did he just expect them to think it was no big deal? Or that they’d suddenly just decide to stop being friends? That was one thing Purpled knew for certain: bonds like theirs were hard to break. Moments like these just made them stronger. </p><p>Purpled’s mouth was ahead of his thoughts, because suddenly, he was talking, “Listen, I-I know I’m not as good at this stuff--this emotional stuff--as you guys are, but… I want to try. I noticed something was off today, too, Tubbo, and I didn’t do anything either, so… how good of a friend does that make me? I noticed how stressed you all seemed and I stayed quiet. But-But I’ll do more, from now on. Because that’s what friends do. They help each other out.”</p><p>It felt awkward. It felt stunted and weird, but both Tubbo and Tommy looked shocked into awe. They-They looked appreciative, and that's about all Purpled could ask for. They got the message, and it made him feel like a weight was lifted off his shoulders. </p><p>Tommy blinked first, shaking his head and hiding his eyes behind an arm. He inhaled shakily, and finally spoke.</p><p>-</p><p>“It-It means a lot, you guys,” he croaked, willing the tears in his eyes to disappear. “I… really don’t know how to handle anything right now, so… it's nice to know you’ll be there for me.” </p><p>“Of course, Tommy,” Tubbo insisted at the same time Purpled said, “It's not like we’d just leave you alone.” </p><p>He’d been so nervous all fucking day to say this. It’d been so easy with Wilbur and Techno, he’d been so lost and felt so safe that the words just rolled right off his tongue. Now, having had to initiate the call with Tubbo and Purpled, it felt like unveiling a dark secret. It felt like something to be ashamed of. Almost as if once he said it, they’d abandon him for being so pitiful. But that was stupid, because he already had proof that wouldn’t happen. Ranboo sat right in front him, already supporting him in any way he could. He never should have even considered doubting Tubbo and Purpled. </p><p>“But, if you don’t mind me asking, why isn’t Ranboo here? Does he-Does he know?” Tubbo asked tentatively, making Purpled freeze contemplatively. </p><p>“Yeah, I do,” Ranboo spoke up before Tommy got the chance to speak. He shot Ranboo a grateful look as he scooted around and sat beside him. It saved him from another explanation. Ranboo answered the questions before they could be asked, “Hey, I’ve been here the whole time. Moral support. We’re at Phil’s… and I guess we both pretty much live here now.” </p><p>Somehow, things were ok. The world didn’t crumble around him, he wasn’t left crying alone in the dark, he had more support than he could have ever hoped for. Even for the briefest of moments, being able to let go seemed possible. If not now, then someday. He’d have shoulders to cry and people to fall back on and hearts to love him. It was all very soft and warmhearted, and Tommy was starting to wish he could go back to being rough-edged and brash. He was getting sick of all the squishy feelings. </p><p>Eventually, after a few more explanations and reassurances, they said their goodbyes to Tubbo and Purpled and the room was quiet once again. He sat shoulder to shoulder with Ranboo in the yellow light of the lamp. They stared at Tommy’s phone as it buzzed, watching messages of <em>”talk to me if you need anything”</em> and <em>”I’ll be here if you need to talk”</em> popped up on his screen. It was comforting. It made his racing heart slow down. It made the future feel less imposing. It made things easier. </p><p>-</p><p>“Feel a bit easier?” Ranboo asked hopefully, glancing away from the phone and at Tommy. </p><p>Slowly, Tommy nodded, powering off his phone’s screen and leaning his head back against the bed. He exhaled through his nose and quietly announced, “Yeah… a bit easier.” </p><p>Ranboo smiled, copying Tommy and leaning his head back. “That’s good to hear.”</p><p>He meant it. The amount of relief those four words made him feel was immeasurable. He couldn’t stand the idea of Tommy being crushed by the weight of what he was feeling. It felt so similar but also not close at all to what Ranboo knew. He’d been at some pretty low lows, and if he could help Tommy avoid those even just a bit, he’d do it. No one deserved to feel as awful as he did then. </p><p>As the world moved with perfect timing, Phil’s voice echoed upstairs, “Dinner’s ready!” </p><p>Wilbur’s voice followed afterward, “Come eat while it’s hot, gremlins!” </p><p>Ranboo huffed a laugh, pushing himself forward and up. He stumbled on his feet for a second before steadying himself and turning towards Tommy. He offered a hand and asked, “Wanna go see everyone?”</p><p>“Yeah, I think I do,” Tommy answered. </p><p>He shoved his phone in his hoodie pocket and grabbed Ranboo’s hand, letting himself be pulled to his feet. Their cheeks were still flushed and eyes still a bit red, but that would be fine. They trundled down the stairs, met at the bottom with Wilbur who instantly ruffled their hair and tossed his arms around their shoulders, guiding them to the table. It was full of food and family and friends, and there was nothing more Ranboo could ask for. </p><p>Sometimes, life sucked. That's just how it worked. Most of the time, though, life was pretty alright. With other people to enjoy it with you, it was amazing.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>its 1 AM I can't be assed to make a better end note LMAO hope it wasn't too janky</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I appreciate any and all comments/kudos/bookmarks you choose to leave! </p><p>You can follow my <a href="https://quibbels.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a> for fic updates and my <a href="https://mobile.twitter.com/quiblii">twitter</a> to see more stuff from me!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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